Comments on: My Ring & Me http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/ Weddings. Minus the insanity, plus the marriage. Wed, 23 May 2012 09:22:22 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Helen http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-106834 Helen Thu, 26 Apr 2012 19:03:00 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-106834 I realize I'm coming to this conversation *years* after the fact but your post and the comments really resonated with me. My fiancee and I are both uncomfortable supporting the diamond industry so we decided against buying any kind of diamond for my ring. I do love sparkly white stones though, so I chose a simple cushion cut moissanite solitaire which I absolutely love. The problem I've been having is figuring out how to respond when people mistake if for a diamond. Friends and family are easy since I'm happy to discuss our decision with them but I'm struggling with shorter exchanges and more casual acquaintances. I feel weird not correcting them (feels an awful lot like lying) but it feels kind of rude and inappropriate to launch into a rant about the diamond industry with someone who was just trying to congratulate me (especially when so many of these people are wearing sizable diamonds). We've only been engaged a few weeks so hopefully I'll figure out the "right response" soon (or at least before the wedding!) I realize I’m coming to this conversation *years* after the fact but your post and the comments really resonated with me.

My fiancee and I are both uncomfortable supporting the diamond industry so we decided against buying any kind of diamond for my ring. I do love sparkly white stones though, so I chose a simple cushion cut moissanite solitaire which I absolutely love.

The problem I’ve been having is figuring out how to respond when people mistake if for a diamond. Friends and family are easy since I’m happy to discuss our decision with them but I’m struggling with shorter exchanges and more casual acquaintances. I feel weird not correcting them (feels an awful lot like lying) but it feels kind of rude and inappropriate to launch into a rant about the diamond industry with someone who was just trying to congratulate me (especially when so many of these people are wearing sizable diamonds).

We’ve only been engaged a few weeks so hopefully I’ll figure out the “right response” soon (or at least before the wedding!)

]]> By: anne http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-91071 anne Fri, 13 Jan 2012 22:43:48 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-91071 i just recently got engaged and had a ... discussion? ... with relatives about rings. a cousin asked what kind of wedding ring are you getting? one that matches the engagement ring (to wear together)? and i had already picked out the wedding band that i want. does not match the engagement right at all, and i don't intend to wear both together anyway. so when i stated that fact, the next question was: “then how will people know you're married?” and “you're going to get a lot of questions!” i had to laugh and said well people who know i got married will know i’m married so ... i don’t think wearing the ring proves to people you’re married. that’s a bond you have with your partner, ring or no ring! and i like that i get TWO different rings to wear at different times on my left hand ;-) i just recently got engaged and had a … discussion? … with relatives about rings. a cousin asked what kind of wedding ring are you getting? one that matches the engagement ring (to wear together)? and i had already picked out the wedding band that i want. does not match the engagement right at all, and i don’t intend to wear both together anyway. so when i stated that fact, the next question was: “then how will people know you’re married?” and “you’re going to get a lot of questions!” i had to laugh and said well people who know i got married will know i’m married so …

i don’t think wearing the ring proves to people you’re married. that’s a bond you have with your partner, ring or no ring! and i like that i get TWO different rings to wear at different times on my left hand ;-)

]]> By: FJane http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-77858 FJane Fri, 04 Nov 2011 22:19:57 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-77858 My Fiance proposed without a ring (well we kinda just decided together that we would be 'engaged'). So I chose my own ring it is hand made out of recycled yellow gold with a hammered texture and a matte finish. It is a very thin band with a faceted moonstone set on top. I think it is beautiful I have always liked moonstones and don't see the point of spending a huge amount of money to get a ring that looks like everyone else's ! ....but I do find myself explaining to everyone that I chose it, and I really like moonstones..... people seem kind of disappointed when they see it they say with surprise "Its so delicate!" I love this blog... it makes me feel better :-) My Fiance proposed without a ring (well we kinda just decided together that we would be ‘engaged’). So I chose my own ring it is hand made out of recycled yellow gold with a hammered texture and a matte finish. It is a very thin band with a faceted moonstone set on top. I think it is beautiful I have always liked moonstones and don’t see the point of spending a huge amount of money to get a ring that looks like everyone else’s !

….but I do find myself explaining to everyone that I chose it, and I really like moonstones…..
people seem kind of disappointed when they see it they say with surprise “Its so delicate!”

I love this blog… it makes me feel better :-)

]]> By: Futuremrsreyes http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-57249 Futuremrsreyes Wed, 27 Apr 2011 05:00:09 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-57249 I love this post so much! My FH proposed to me with a 1/5 carat gold solitaire. Classic and simple. I had always imagined myself with a solitaire because as beautiful as trendy rings are, I wanted something timeless I knew that I would always love. From day one I have been asked "wheres the big rock??" Been told "its cute" and been reminded that I can upgrade someday. People ask me what ring do I really want? Blah blah blah. It makes me sad that people dont think my ring is good enough and ill admit that I have looked in stores and online at other options but I wouldnt feel comfortable with a ring that took up half my finger because im not a jewelry person. Im not opposed to upgrading because to me its still a "thing" but I love my ring and I feel no need to change it. Thanks for reminding me thats all that matters I love this post so much! My FH proposed to me with a 1/5 carat gold solitaire. Classic and simple. I had always imagined myself with a solitaire because as beautiful as trendy rings are, I wanted something timeless I knew that I would always love. From day one I have been asked “wheres the big rock??” Been told “its cute” and been reminded that I can upgrade someday. People ask me what ring do I really want? Blah blah blah. It makes me sad that people dont think my ring is good enough and ill admit that I have looked in stores and online at other options but I wouldnt feel comfortable with a ring that took up half my finger because im not a jewelry person. Im not opposed to upgrading because to me its still a “thing” but I love my ring and I feel no need to change it. Thanks for reminding me thats all that matters

]]> By: Rose http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-38964 Rose Thu, 02 Dec 2010 03:01:32 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-38964 I wear my grandmother's diamond on my right hand (unfortunately we had to re-set it because her setting was no longer safe). It's also an "old mine cut" - meaning it's not that sparkly. It's almost a carat, and I feel it's too big, but I love it. It means so much to me and to my mother. My boyfriend cannot grasp the concept that I do NOT want a new ring - I already have one that is beautiful and that means so much to me, and will mean even more to me when we are engaged. (At this point the engagement is just a matter of time.) It's so difficult to convince him, but I WILL - and only because APW has given me the conviction to do so. (Constantly a lurker, never a commenter.) I wear my grandmother’s diamond on my right hand (unfortunately we had to re-set it because her setting was no longer safe). It’s also an “old mine cut” – meaning it’s not that sparkly. It’s almost a carat, and I feel it’s too big, but I love it. It means so much to me and to my mother. My boyfriend cannot grasp the concept that I do NOT want a new ring – I already have one that is beautiful and that means so much to me, and will mean even more to me when we are engaged. (At this point the engagement is just a matter of time.) It’s so difficult to convince him, but I WILL – and only because APW has given me the conviction to do so.

(Constantly a lurker, never a commenter.)

]]> By: Caitlin http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-37356 Caitlin Fri, 19 Nov 2010 02:48:01 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-37356 My fiance picked out a beautiful 1950s pearl ring out of a pile of idea I had given to my girlfriends. I wouldn't have been able to choose among my own selections, but he somehow picked the perfect one and I adore it. I constantly have to explain that it is even an engagement ring, and then give the whole story. While it gets old sometimes, I love having something unique and beautiful that is not your standard wedding-industry-backed product. My fiance picked out a beautiful 1950s pearl ring out of a pile of idea I had given to my girlfriends. I wouldn’t have been able to choose among my own selections, but he somehow picked the perfect one and I adore it. I constantly have to explain that it is even an engagement ring, and then give the whole story. While it gets old sometimes, I love having something unique and beautiful that is not your standard wedding-industry-backed product.

]]> By: Karina http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-26048 Karina Tue, 31 Aug 2010 20:14:45 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-26048 My fiance always jokes that he won my ring out of a quarter machine (he didn't) but even if he did I would wear it proudly everyday because of what it means (that he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me) I was lucky enough to find someone who loves me and knows enough about me to get exactly the ring I would have picked out myself, and everytime I look at it on my finger, I'm reminded of that! My fiance always jokes that he won my ring out of a quarter machine (he didn’t) but even if he did I would wear it proudly everyday because of what it means (that he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me) I was lucky enough to find someone who loves me and knows enough about me to get exactly the ring I would have picked out myself, and everytime I look at it on my finger, I’m reminded of that!

]]> By: Priscilla http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-16666 Priscilla Wed, 12 May 2010 20:03:40 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-16666 I had to come back and read this today. I read APracticalWedding religiously, and I've read all the archives, and this one stuck. And today, when the second person said, I like your ring it's so small, I had to come right back here and reread. Twice. Thank you, Meg. I love my ring, and I don't even think it's small, and I'm kind of small, and it fits me. And anything else would not have fit my style. And he picked it out. Thank you, Meg. I had to come back and read this today. I read APracticalWedding religiously, and I’ve read all the archives, and this one stuck. And today, when the second person said, I like your ring it’s so small, I had to come right back here and reread. Twice. Thank you, Meg. I love my ring, and I don’t even think it’s small, and I’m kind of small, and it fits me. And anything else would not have fit my style. And he picked it out.

Thank you, Meg.

]]> By: Amy http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-9555 Amy Mon, 15 Sep 2008 12:01:25 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-9555 Honest to god, I get this all the time because I didn't want a diamond. I didn't want to wonder if my diamond was causing bloodshed. So, I opted for a striking pink sapphire heart (I always watned a heart shaped engagement ring). And it matches some stunning earrings in the same shape/stone that he got me for our first anniversary. It's not an engagement ring. It's a regular ring. It doesn't "fit" flush with my band. The heart's butt fits over the very slender wedding band we picked out. I planned it that way. But there are moments I am like why this ring, but I can't whine I did pick it out. But I love it. It's a true reflection of me and well no one else has it. Honest to god, I get this all the time because I didn’t want a diamond. I didn’t want to wonder if my diamond was causing bloodshed. So, I opted for a striking pink sapphire heart (I always watned a heart shaped engagement ring). And it matches some stunning earrings in the same shape/stone that he got me for our first anniversary. It’s not an engagement ring. It’s a regular ring. It doesn’t “fit” flush with my band. The heart’s butt fits over the very slender wedding band we picked out. I planned it that way. But there are moments I am like why this ring, but I can’t whine I did pick it out. But I love it. It’s a true reflection of me and well no one else has it.

]]> By: Liz http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/comment-page-1/#comment-9556 Liz Wed, 30 Jul 2008 19:39:36 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2008/07/my-ring-me/#comment-9556 Thank you for the post (and comments!)! Sometimes it is nice to know that you're not alone in the world...<br /><br />My engagement ring is a sapphire and it is absolutely gorgeous. My fiance picked it out and completely surprised me. I love that he put so much thought into picking the setting and the stone (basically it isn't heat treated, like most sapphires, making it rare). Unfortunately, whenever anyone asks to see my ring I always get a, "Is that what you asked for? Are sapphires your birth stone?" (Ironically diamonds are my birth stone.) Some people at I know didn't even realize I was engaged, they just thought I was wearing a new ring!<br /><br />As sappy as this sounds, what is important to me is that every time I'm on the train or in the car and I see my ring, I know that it was put together with love and that is what is truly important. Thank you for the post (and comments!)! Sometimes it is nice to know that you’re not alone in the world…

My engagement ring is a sapphire and it is absolutely gorgeous. My fiance picked it out and completely surprised me. I love that he put so much thought into picking the setting and the stone (basically it isn’t heat treated, like most sapphires, making it rare). Unfortunately, whenever anyone asks to see my ring I always get a, “Is that what you asked for? Are sapphires your birth stone?” (Ironically diamonds are my birth stone.) Some people at I know didn’t even realize I was engaged, they just thought I was wearing a new ring!

As sappy as this sounds, what is important to me is that every time I’m on the train or in the car and I see my ring, I know that it was put together with love and that is what is truly important.

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