It's been a while since I've given you an update on our wedding, so here we go. First off: of course the second I wrote a post about the absurdity of pre-fab wedding lists, my real life wedding list kicked into overdrive. In the past two weeks alone: my wedding dress arrived almost completed, we went shopping for lace trim for the dress, I got the materials to make both my veil and my headpiece, we finished our invitation design, we sent our invitations to the printer, we paid the final deposit for our venue, we started the process of ordering our wedding bands, we ordered vases for the flowers, we wrote our wedding service, we've continued pre-marital counseling, and we found a Ketubah to order... and honestly? I'm not even sure if that's it, because I can't remember anymore.
In sum: we've done a lot of wonderful, deep, rich, emotional work, and we've written a lot of checks. Mmmm.... writing checks. I think no matter how much money you are spending on your wedding, and no matter how thrifty you are trying to be, there will still be a point in the planning process where you feel like you are forking over a lot of money. Hopefully you're forking over an amount of money you feel comfortable with to people who's work your thrilled to support, but at the end of the day, money is still leaving your bank account. And for me at least, it's exhausting.
So I was lying in bed one night, feeling exhausted by all the spendspendspend tied to the wedding this month, and suddenly everything shifted. I looked up at my wedding dress hanging on my armoire and had a little burst of happiness. Then I thought about how soon we'd have the invitations we'd been planning for a year in our hands, and something clicked. I realized that the wedding we'd been dreaming of was finally coming together. I realized that that the handmade wedding that I'd hoped for, in some tiny part of me, for years and years was just around the corner.
And you know what? It all feels worth it. I don't know how important weddings are in the end. It is, after all, just one day in a life that is hopefully long and full. But I do know that having a wedding where the choices felt right, where the wedding felt like us, was how we wanted to start our married life together. These days all the pieces of that celebration are all over our house: the wedding dress waiting for lace to be hand-sewn on, the stylish and affordable vases piled in a corner, the cases of good local wine in the kitchen, and the birch huppah poles leaning up against the bookcase. And for now, for me, that is a good place to be. It is enough.
Picture: sneak peak of my handmade wedding dress, in progress
eeep! it looks pretty damn amazing! can’t wait to see it in action :-)
April 27, 2009 4:12 am
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Loving the “sneak peek”–it looks flowy and right.
I am happy things are coming together so well for you guys! We have been plowing through as well and keep having those moments of “seeing it” too. They happen as much during happy times (finding out beautiful wedding bands!) and shitty times (having my difficult mother knock the wind out of my sails, forcing us to have some good conversations about what this is about), but more and more it’s clear that this thing is going to happen!
April 27, 2009 4:27 am
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It is all worth it. I never wanted a big wedding and we tried to keep everything authentic and down to earth but inevitably costs spiral and I was uncomfortable with writing all those cheques too. Three weeks on from our wedding day though I don’t regret a penny of it because it was quite simply the best day of my life. Hope yours is too.
April 27, 2009 5:34 am
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Less than three weeks before my wedding, I can certainly relate to that post. There is some stress, but mostly I’ve been so happy lately, so full of love and excitement for what’s to come. It is great to see it all coming together!
Your dress looks lovely.
April 27, 2009 6:24 am
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I believe perhaps the god of wedding lists heard your post and sent this flurry of activity like Zeus sending down thunderbolts. Just to remind you. Your dress looks absolutely completely beautiful and I wish you a wedding day to match.
April 27, 2009 6:39 am
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Oh, yay! Meg, I’m so glad you’re feeling content. I know it will be a wonderful day for you both! xo
April 27, 2009 6:46 am
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Hi Meg – Can you please post a step by step on DIYing your veil? I’ve been pondering going this route but am a bit scared since I’m no seamstress!!!
April 27, 2009 7:00 am
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It sounds wonderful, Meg!
This weekend was nothing but wedding wedding wedding for us too, but I’m starting to get really excited. My sister and I have a date at Britex for veil fabric, woo hoo!
And, Laura, in case you haven’t seen this DIY veil bit:
http://100layercake.com/blog/archives/368
Happy Monday!
Tris
April 27, 2009 7:42 am
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Hey Laura,
I haven’t made my veil yet. I’m no DIY genius either, but it’s a veil for goodness sakes, how hard can it be? ;) Besides, all in, my veil cost me $10 at Britex. So with that kind of savings, there is little choice!
I’ll post more about it when it’s done though.
Meg
April 27, 2009 7:54 am
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Oh, and that 100 layer cake veil is lovely, but also a bit more complicated then a more basic veil (which is what I’m making).
April 27, 2009 7:55 am
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Our wedding is in 2 weeks and I feel happy too. I felt happy doing my veil on thursday (yes, done this too), doing my programs yesterday, looking for the perfect place for our photos, even under the rain…
There are still things to do but my list is shortening ;-) (and yes, a list at this point is necessary because there’s a heap of small stuff that needs to be done and that’s easy to forget…).
April 27, 2009 8:08 am
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Aw … what a lovely post. And you may have just motivated me to get off my butt & make some stuff happen, too.
April 27, 2009 9:01 am
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Ooh, it looks beautiful! Can’t wait to see more.
April 27, 2009 9:14 am
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The sneak peek is beautiful, and I love your choice of lace. Can’t wait to see it on you.
April 27, 2009 9:15 am
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the dress looks amazing! how exciting!
April 27, 2009 9:37 am
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The dress looks fabulous…I’m glad it’s bringing you joy and relaxation. I sent this link to my friend, who is stressing about shelling out money for her August wedding.
April 27, 2009 9:45 am
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such a lovely dress!
April 27, 2009 9:57 am
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LOL! I know how you feel on the wedding stuff everywhere. I have it in my closet, my living room, the office, everywhere!
Your dress looks awesome.
April 27, 2009 9:57 am
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mmmm.
April 27, 2009 10:40 am
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Oh Meg, you’re going to look so pretty!
I’m so glad to see a bit of your dress, I think about it all the time! It makes me all tearful and soppy that your sister made it for you. And jealous that I don’t have a sister.
April 27, 2009 10:53 am
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the dress looks gorgeous…your day will be lovely because you and your fiance are lovely. simply lovely.
xox
April 27, 2009 5:32 pm
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lovely post :)
April 28, 2009 4:37 am
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Ooh a dress-related post! I actually have a different modification of your pattern to make a 14th century dress and it’s a fantastic pattern! You’re gonna look so pretty…
April 28, 2009 7:12 am
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Yay! I’m excited for you. You’ll have a great time!!
April 28, 2009 8:53 am
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YAY! Things are coming together for you – that must be such a wonderful breath of fresh air.
I feel like I’m experiencing my first melt down. Awesome. But I’ll get over it :-)
April 28, 2009 12:12 pm
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That dress looks beautiful! I’m so glad you had that aha moment after all the exhaustion. When things fall into place it really makes all that work seem worth it. I’m so looking forward to seeing your wedding!
April 29, 2009 6:50 am
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