Comments on: Promise. http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/ Weddings. Minus the insanity, plus the marriage. Thu, 24 May 2012 02:22:19 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Anonymous http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2640 Anonymous Mon, 14 Dec 2009 19:55:09 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2640 This post hit home for me. My future husband and I both made the decision that we will follow all of our dreams. Traveling being the #1. So we both got jobs as english teachers overseas. By the time we return home this summer we would have been to 10 countries! We also have no bills, rent or mortgage to worry about and have saved a nice bundle of cash. There are so many excuses we tell ourseles to prevent us from living our lives.. You just have to do it or else before you know it it will be too late. This post hit home for me. My future husband and I both made the decision that we will follow all of our dreams. Traveling being the #1. So we both got jobs as english teachers overseas. By the time we return home this summer we would have been to 10 countries! We also have no bills, rent or mortgage to worry about and have saved a nice bundle of cash. There are so many excuses we tell ourseles to prevent us from living our lives.. You just have to do it or else before you know it it will be too late.

]]> By: Meg http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2641 Meg Thu, 26 Nov 2009 22:05:36 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2641 But Kristen, the point he was making is not that you should travel, but that you should not postpone doing what you want to do together, because life is short. And you're getting your PhD's!! You can't have it all, the point is to grab onto life (and each other) as it passes. Two Phd's is plenty for now. Plenty. But Kristen, the point he was making is not that you should travel, but that you should not postpone doing what you want to do together, because life is short. And you're getting your PhD's!! You can't have it all, the point is to grab onto life (and each other) as it passes. Two Phd's is plenty for now. Plenty.

]]> By: Anicka http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2642 Anicka Thu, 26 Nov 2009 15:47:32 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2642 My parents never got to go on their honeymoon. They put it off for one reason or another (having kids was a part of it) and then my dad died not 20 years into their marriage. When my mom told me this, I felt the same way we're all probably feeling now.<br /><br />That said, I find I still have a hard time just going for it...I dream and hope and plan, but that last step, actually doing it, is always difficult for me.<br /><br />Thank you for this post and thank you for maintaining this amazing blog and giving us all food for thoughts. I loved reading your musings during my pre-wedding period (got married in October), but I think I enjoy the marriage discussion even more. My parents never got to go on their honeymoon. They put it off for one reason or another (having kids was a part of it) and then my dad died not 20 years into their marriage. When my mom told me this, I felt the same way we're all probably feeling now.

That said, I find I still have a hard time just going for it…I dream and hope and plan, but that last step, actually doing it, is always difficult for me.

Thank you for this post and thank you for maintaining this amazing blog and giving us all food for thoughts. I loved reading your musings during my pre-wedding period (got married in October), but I think I enjoy the marriage discussion even more.

]]> By: KRISTIN http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2643 KRISTIN Thu, 26 Nov 2009 12:44:16 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2643 I am a true believer in setting life goals and working hard to achieve them. To me, however, they have to make sense and "cents." No matter how old we are and where we are in life, I think part of us will always long for more, more, more. For some, this longing might be for material possessions--for others, experiences. <br /><br />My husband and I were married in June and are working to accomplish many of our dreams. We paid for our wedding in cash--which this blog inspired us to do. Our definition of practical was refusing to allow anyone (including our parents)to go into debt due to a day that should be a celebration in every way! <br /><br />One week after our honeymoon, we moved 17 hrs away and began our PhDs. It truly was a leap of faith to go from good jobs to assistantships which just barely pay cover all of the bills. <br /><br />Although we want to see the world together, our 10 yr goal includes paying off ALL of our debt first. This includes car loans, student loans, etc. We understand that if we work hard and sacrifice now, we'll be a slave to no one later. We will have the financial freedom to travel and explore the world--even if little ones are in tow. (And I hope they will be.)<br /><br />And God forbid something happen to either one of us, we will have ensured that the other will have financial stability and will not have to worry about the financial costs of losing a spouse--which can be significant if one is not prepared. It may sound morbid to consider, but unfortunately, it's real life.<br /><br />I say all of that to say that I think there is value in postponing some dreams for a short time in order to see those dreams realized--in full--somewhere down the road. <br /><br />P.S. Meg--you rock my world! I am a true believer in setting life goals and working hard to achieve them. To me, however, they have to make sense and "cents." No matter how old we are and where we are in life, I think part of us will always long for more, more, more. For some, this longing might be for material possessions–for others, experiences.

My husband and I were married in June and are working to accomplish many of our dreams. We paid for our wedding in cash–which this blog inspired us to do. Our definition of practical was refusing to allow anyone (including our parents)to go into debt due to a day that should be a celebration in every way!

One week after our honeymoon, we moved 17 hrs away and began our PhDs. It truly was a leap of faith to go from good jobs to assistantships which just barely pay cover all of the bills.

Although we want to see the world together, our 10 yr goal includes paying off ALL of our debt first. This includes car loans, student loans, etc. We understand that if we work hard and sacrifice now, we'll be a slave to no one later. We will have the financial freedom to travel and explore the world–even if little ones are in tow. (And I hope they will be.)

And God forbid something happen to either one of us, we will have ensured that the other will have financial stability and will not have to worry about the financial costs of losing a spouse–which can be significant if one is not prepared. It may sound morbid to consider, but unfortunately, it's real life.

I say all of that to say that I think there is value in postponing some dreams for a short time in order to see those dreams realized–in full–somewhere down the road.

P.S. Meg–you rock my world!

]]> By: Meg http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2644 Meg Thu, 26 Nov 2009 09:00:15 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2644 Ah, yes. But the point is don't put off what you want to do together... not travel all the time. Lauren and I want to travel at the moment, but that may have nothing to do with what *you guys* want to do together.<br /><br />Just do it. Don't put it off. And happy Thanksgiving. Ah, yes. But the point is don't put off what you want to do together… not travel all the time. Lauren and I want to travel at the moment, but that may have nothing to do with what *you guys* want to do together.

Just do it. Don't put it off. And happy Thanksgiving.

]]> By: Wifey Wiferson http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2645 Wifey Wiferson Thu, 26 Nov 2009 05:30:02 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2645 Michele brings up an important point. We do need to find a happy medium between planning for the future and having adventures with eachother now. Some of the things I want to save for I also consider very exciting (i.e. home buying), even though they are very practical and settled-down things to do. Right now we are trying to decide if we should still go on our long anticipated honeymoon to Paris next year, or somewhere less expensive so we can save for a house and everything else we want to do down the road. Because I want both those things very much, even though one is kind of boring. (I think we are still probably going to Paris though...) Michele brings up an important point. We do need to find a happy medium between planning for the future and having adventures with eachother now. Some of the things I want to save for I also consider very exciting (i.e. home buying), even though they are very practical and settled-down things to do. Right now we are trying to decide if we should still go on our long anticipated honeymoon to Paris next year, or somewhere less expensive so we can save for a house and everything else we want to do down the road. Because I want both those things very much, even though one is kind of boring. (I think we are still probably going to Paris though…)

]]> By: kaitlin http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2646 kaitlin Wed, 25 Nov 2009 23:26:28 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2646 Mmmmmhmmmm. I agree. Because honestly, I'd rather remember the journeys than the nice fridge with an ice dispenser. Mmmmmhmmmm. I agree. Because honestly, I'd rather remember the journeys than the nice fridge with an ice dispenser.

]]> By: Meg http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2647 Meg Wed, 25 Nov 2009 21:46:35 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2647 Ohhhh @j<br />That's me today. Like right this second. And now I'm being told to come to the other room so we can read books next to each other.<br /><br />I think, maybe, this first year of formally being a family is the year of imagining. Here we are together. What would we like to dream up next.<br /><br />x Ohhhh @j
That's me today. Like right this second. And now I'm being told to come to the other room so we can read books next to each other.

I think, maybe, this first year of formally being a family is the year of imagining. Here we are together. What would we like to dream up next.

x

]]> By: j. http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2648 j. Wed, 25 Nov 2009 21:17:25 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2648 I love you, guys. I need to say it. I HAVE to say it. I've been a steady lurker (could you call me a lurker since I have you in my Google Reader and out of the 100+ blogs I have to read, I always check to see if you have new ones first? Yeah... I'm a lurker alright) for quite a while now, but I had to say that I felt the need to tell you that I totally agree. With everything in this post... and I'll tell you why. <br /><br />My fiance (Mark) and I have been engaged for about a year, with our relationship spanning over almost four years. Why has it taken us so long to get married, let alone be together? Because, technically, we aren't together -- physically, that is. The fact of the matter is that he is in the US, and I'm in Canada -- so for us to be together everyday and finally married next month, is a huge step. <br /><br />The dream of wanting children and the house and the perfect job is overshadowed by the fact that all those things would not matter if we didn't have each other to share it with. Don't get me wrong -- when we're ready and prepared, or when it's meant to be down the road, the kids and everything will will come along. We want to have everything, and although some people may say it's impossible, we don't, because we have had (and still have), each other. I just know that right now, I want only him and me, and this is our time to be selfish. Traveling and experiencing new things have always been important to the both of us, and although the American dream is too, we know that the experience of being married, just being young and just being "us" -- him and me -- will only be caught in the moment that is now. I love you, guys. I need to say it. I HAVE to say it. I've been a steady lurker (could you call me a lurker since I have you in my Google Reader and out of the 100+ blogs I have to read, I always check to see if you have new ones first? Yeah… I'm a lurker alright) for quite a while now, but I had to say that I felt the need to tell you that I totally agree. With everything in this post… and I'll tell you why.

My fiance (Mark) and I have been engaged for about a year, with our relationship spanning over almost four years. Why has it taken us so long to get married, let alone be together? Because, technically, we aren't together — physically, that is. The fact of the matter is that he is in the US, and I'm in Canada — so for us to be together everyday and finally married next month, is a huge step.

The dream of wanting children and the house and the perfect job is overshadowed by the fact that all those things would not matter if we didn't have each other to share it with. Don't get me wrong — when we're ready and prepared, or when it's meant to be down the road, the kids and everything will will come along. We want to have everything, and although some people may say it's impossible, we don't, because we have had (and still have), each other. I just know that right now, I want only him and me, and this is our time to be selfish. Traveling and experiencing new things have always been important to the both of us, and although the American dream is too, we know that the experience of being married, just being young and just being "us" — him and me — will only be caught in the moment that is now.

]]> By: Mrs T http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/comment-page-1/#comment-2649 Mrs T Wed, 25 Nov 2009 18:37:55 +0000 http://apracticalwedding.com/2009/11/promise/#comment-2649 What great words of wisdom from the professor. Thanks for sharing this. What great words of wisdom from the professor. Thanks for sharing this.

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