Well, hello, you.
Those of you long-time readers have probably noticed that over the last month, I haven’t been writing a great deal, and perhaps you have been wondering if something was up. Had I given up writing? (as if ) Was something going on with me? Well, yes. Something has been going on with me. Something headspinningly huge, and awesome, and scary, and also something I wasn’t at liberty to talk about yet. So instead of writing, I ran around making a lot of appointments, and waving my hands around in panic and/or excitement, depending.
You see, the week before Christmas, I quit my job to go full time on APW. My first day of working full time on the blog was Tuesday. This is what my workspace looked like at 9:30am Tuesday morning:
And no, none of this has sunk in yet.
To answer your first question (everyone’s first question), no, David does not have a job yet (though he does go to court and wear a suit a lot, so we do count him as pretty lucky in this economy). But. There comes a time where the endless martyrdom needs to end, and the risks such-that-there are need to be taken, and leaps of faith must be made. So here we are, leaping.
Let me back up the time-line and explain things a little better, now that I’m not under contract for an employer, and I feel like I can.
When we moved to San Francisco, I took a job as a research writer in an investment bank. The story of how I took that job is too long for this post, but suffice to say: New York theatre jobs were quit, New York temp jobs were acquired, boss at said temp job thought I was the bee’s knees, San Francisco jobs were offered, shoulders were shrugged and new jobs were taken. It always helps to learn a little more about how to read a balance sheet, right? Yes.
So, there I was, at an investment bank, writing about “the most boring sector in the world, banks” in 2007. And then this small thing happened, called the global financial meltdown, and there I was on the front line, writing about banks. Not the plan at all. Also planning a wedding, which was far more part of the plan, but I was doing it in a world where $100,000 weddings were the norm. Hum.
I was really stressed. I was crying a lot. David suggested I start a blog called A Practical Wedding. I did.
And then the financial meltdown really took hold. The afternoon that Lehman Brothers collapsed, I was sitting on our couch, blogging long pushed to the side, with my company laptop in my lap, my blackberry sitting beside me, CNBC on the television, trying to write and crying. Because rather unfortunately, I understood what was playing out across my TV screen, and just how bad it could get. David bundled me up and drove me across the Golden Gate bridge that day, sat me on a rock over looking the bay and the city, and told me, “See that? Even if our money is worthless next week, that city is still going to be standing, and we’re still going to be alive.”
And that’s when I decided this experiment in working at a bank? Not the best experiment. Unfortunately, I had a husband in law school, and bills to pay, and I didn’t have a lot of choices. But I could write, here at APW, and write I did. And write, and write, and write.
About this time last year, right after our trip to New Orleans, it became clear to everyone (me very much included) that writing about bank stocks was not for me. It also became really clear to me that I wanted to write on the internet for a living, d*mn it, but that I couldn’t make that happen working 6 am to 6 pm (yes, those were my real hours.) So they offered me as an overpaid secretary,* and I took it. And let me be clear, that was one of the hardest choices I’d ever made in my life. Being a secretary as I turned thirty? Not exactly what I had planned for myself.
It was, however, extremely motivating. (And I was paying the bills, d*mn it, which was something to be proud of.)
So last spring I re-launched APW. That seemed like the first step towards getting my already-pretty-well-read-blog taken seriously… but there was this little catch I didn’t see coming. The work tripled. I went from APW being a really fun hobby, to APW being a full time job, when I already had a full time job. I stopped having any free time. I kept getting really sick from the nonstop working. (And let me just add, lest this sound like a sob story, one of those times I got really sick? We were flying to Italy, so clearly things were not *too* awful. There are upsides to working way too much.) All of this time, I kept my fingers crossed that David would find a job… soon. And he didn’t (nobody we knew did).
And then Mighty Summit happened, and my take away from that weekend was, “F*ck it. I’m just going to make this thing happen.”
{Picture: Me at Mighty Summit with a little message from the universe.}
So this fall was a non-stop to-do list. Get interns, check. Get an accountant, check. Review and update my business model so I can support a family, check. Get quickbooks set up, check. Meet with the accountant to set up a budget, check. Hire interns as staff members, check. Get an office.
Oh, did I mention? I actually have an office. Of my own. That I go to, to work for myself (more on that coming soon).
So here we are. This morning I’ll get up at 7, I will get dressed in jeans and boots and a cute sweater – because I can wear that to work now – and go to my office. I’ll panic a little bit, trying to decide how crazy I was, exactly, to decide to support two people working on an internet website that I made up myself. Then I’ll shrug, make myself some tea and I’ll get to work. And so it goes.
So what is going to happen to APW you ask? Well, nothing much is going to change right this second. This site has been a full time job for the past six months, so the first thing I’m going to do is work on it during the day, and try to spend time with my husband at night and on the weekends, and sleep. Oh, and I’m going to start working on answering the last six months of emails you guys sent me. Sorry about that.
Over the next year, I’m excited that I’ll get the chance to begin growing APW into the more-comprehensive-life-resource-for-smart-and-funny-ladies that we all know it can be. I’ll expand the Reclaiming Wife section, I’ll bring on new features (the return to the How-To column is the first of those). APW will keep growing, but its focus and message is staying exactly the same: you can build the kind of life you want for yourself, no matter how much money you have. The only difference? I’m actually going to be doing that for myself now too.
Oh, and because I’m me, I’m going to keep right on blogging about my life (that’s what Reclaiming Wife is all about, right? Our lives?) Which will mean telling stories about building a business, now and then. I know there are tons of you who are trying to figure out what you want to do with your professional lives (Been there. That involved a lot of crying for me), and are considering building businesses of your own. So if you have questions for me, or stories you’d like me to tell, just let me know. I’ll be here writing.
And till then? Cheers. You guys made all of this possible, and I’m sitting here in my office, in my very first week of self-employment, toasting you.
*Here is the thing about being a secretary: everyone always tells you not to use the word, and to say “administrative assistant” instead. But, well, I was a secretary, and I find that, as we discussed yesterday, there are power in names. So to those of you out there secretary-ing? My hat is off to you. I know exactly what it entails, and I know it takes a special kind of grit (and some blog reading) to make it through.
Congratulations and best wishes on this new venture in life! :)
January 13, 2011 4:43 am
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Congratulations Meg! This is the best news I’ve heard all week. You are such an inspiration, and I am so happy/excited/proud that you are making this transition. :)
January 13, 2011 4:45 am
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This is awesome, Meg, and you are a total inspiration to me. Hats off to you, lady. You make me SO over the 9 to 5.
January 13, 2011 4:46 am
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Congratulations, Meg! I only just started reading (I just got engaged a week ago) but already I’ve been raving about your site to everyone I know. It’s wonderful that you’ll now be able to make this site – which you are obviously so passionate about – your full time job! Congrats, and good luck!
January 13, 2011 4:47 am
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holy f*ck, meg!!! this is such awesome, amazing, bad-ass news!!!!!!!!!!!!!
January 13, 2011 4:50 am
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Oh my! Congrats!! This is well-deserved
January 13, 2011 4:51 am
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Yaaaayyy!!!!!! There are not enough exclamation points to express how happy I am for you!! I am soo glad we’ll get to hear more of your voice. Not that the others aren’t amazing but I spend a lot of time forwarding your posts with the words “what she said” as the email subject.
Once again you inspire me to finally get off me behind and stop doing the job I hate (pharmacist) and start doing the job I was put on this Earth to do (massage therapist and healer).
So um yeah. Yay!
January 13, 2011 4:52 am
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The world needs more healers (as someone who’s spent the last few months in intensive acupuncture, going OFF my meds), so you rock that out lady.
January 13, 2011 8:59 am
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It’s really interesting to me, that given the state of the economy, how many people are doing “crazy” things like you are. I mean, sure. There are the people who are out of work anyway, so since there’s not much hope on the horizon in the traditional sense, they’re forging their own way. (My husband is a prime example of this. He’s traveling the country and writing a book about his experiences.)
But I’ve also seen people like you, who have realized in this tumultuous economy, that money isn’t everything and “stability” is a relative term. I saw my mother give up her job of 18 years (which was becoming a toxic spiral for her) to take a leap of faith on a brand new job, that required a lot of travel (eep!), public speaking (double eep!) and a longer commute (triple eep in the Northeast winter!), not to mention that her seniority went from 18 years to 1 year, in an industry that values seniority when looking at layoff scenarios. She LOVES it, and is so much happier now than she was before she started a little over a year ago, and she’s even said to me that, if she does get laid off, she’ll “be OK.” The mom I used to know would NEVER be that calm about such a scenario.
I, myself, have been thinking a lot about my future and where I want to go with it. I am not miserable at my job – I actually like most parts of it on most days – but I know it’s not what I want to do long term. It is, however, helping me to decide what I may want to do long term, and that is turning out to be something I always said I NEVER wanted to do, despite so many people saying it was a great path for me. Maybe they knew something I didn’t.
These are things that people don’t think about in a stable economy, and I find it interesting.
January 13, 2011 4:52 am
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The weird thing is, in a lot of ways my new job is more stable than my old job. In my old job, they could lay people off with no notice. In this job, I built something, and it keeps on chugging along as long as I do the work. Plus, when we need money, I can say, “Ok, we need X amount of money, time to hustle for it.” And you can’t do that in traditional work.
So yes, it’s a weird time to give up a fulltime job (erm, this new job is also fulltime, but you know what I mean). But if you’re sensible about it, it can be better.
January 13, 2011 9:02 am
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I do like that part where if you need more money… you can actually do things to produce it, unlike a salary gig.
January 13, 2011 9:53 am
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Plus, when we need money, I can say, “Ok, we need X amount of money, time to hustle for it.”
That’s a REALLY good point, that I hadn’t thought of.
January 13, 2011 2:53 pm
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Congratulations! I’m working really hard to pursue my career goals and sometimes it feels overwhelming and impossible. Hearing about others’ successes always makes me happy and relieved because it reminds me that a lot of persistence and really hard work can take you wherever you want to go. I’m looking forward to watching APW grow!
Oh, and I LOVED your message from the universe!!
January 13, 2011 4:54 am
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Awesome!!!!! Someday I will follow you and jump into a profession my heart desires. Keep inspiring us Meg!!! You rock!
January 13, 2011 5:00 am
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Congratulations! As a not-quite-living-my-dreams-yet-but-getting-there (and over thirty) reader I look forward to seeing this evolve. Best wishes to you and APW.
January 13, 2011 5:01 am
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Yay, hurrah!
Congrats meg!
May your new life adventure be fulfilling!
January 13, 2011 5:02 am
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Yes yes yes! I’m so happy for you & for APW. Congratulations on taking the leap and I look forward to hearing more about how you made it possible and any tips you have. This is one of my favorite blogs and I’m glad the gal(s) behind it will have some free time now! Best of luck.
January 13, 2011 5:02 am
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Hot damn!
January 13, 2011 5:04 am
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Congratulations and Well done.
Ok, so I’m recovering from surgery, which does funny things to a person, but your post got me quite emotional!
I already think APW is a wonderful site, and I’m very excited to hear that it’s going to grow. I had no idea that it wasn’t already as official/staffed as it now is, as I read it on my googlereader, so it gets smushed together with a number of other things and ideas get muddled.
I wonder, then, if you could tell me, because I don’t know enough about the internet, would it help you as a business if I clicked through to to the site each time I read a post on my feed?
Best wishes for the future.
January 13, 2011 5:06 am
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Awww…. it actually does help when you click through. I want to give you cookies for asking. Post-surgery cookies.
January 13, 2011 9:04 am
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Thank you for letting us RSS readers know this, Meg! I am a huge & long time APW fan and will now be clicking through to read each post. (best of luck with this new leap!)
January 13, 2011 10:25 am
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Yikes, I had no idea! Granted, I end up clicking through to read the comments anyways, but I’ll make double and triple sure. Congrats a million times over and over again!
January 13, 2011 8:59 pm
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HOLY HELL YES! Sweetest and most inspirational news to hear this morning after my evil boss literally had me in tears yesterday. CONGRATULATIONS!
January 13, 2011 5:13 am
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Congratulations Meg! I’ve been waiting all week for the “big news” and had a sneaky suspicion from your tweets that this would be it. Well done and wow – you are brave!
January 13, 2011 5:15 am
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Yay Meg!!!!!! Congratulations times a trillion! I’m looking forward to following your business lady journey. My job may be 9 to 5, but I love it, and I know how soul-scraping an unloved job can be, so kudos to you for taking the leap.
January 13, 2011 5:17 am
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WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
January 13, 2011 5:19 am
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Also: your work space? Bliss.
January 13, 2011 5:20 am
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SO inspirational, at a time it is very much needed. Thank you!!
January 13, 2011 5:21 am
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You make living and actually doing dreams feel possible. Cheers to you Meg, and thanks for being the little glimmer of “it can happen, and you can make it happen” in my week.
January 13, 2011 5:24 am
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Congratulations Meg!! You can do it!!! (and we will help)
January 13, 2011 5:26 am
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Congratulations Meg! That is so brave of you, and so very inspirational. I can’t wait to see what the site grows into over the next few months and years, and I’m particularly excited about the reclaiming Wife sections growing! Because really, the N*st gets waaaay too much traffic from people desperate to talk about the whole wife and mother thing, and I hope I can just come here to have those conversations instead.
January 13, 2011 5:38 am
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Huzzah! This is great news on a snowy Thursday morning in Chicago. I take my (fuzzy with pom poms) hat off to you, thank you for APW, and wish you, David and all the APW staff the very best!
January 13, 2011 5:38 am
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Congrats, congrats! As someone who has been a reader and a fan of APW from the start, I’m so excited for you, and for APW. And hey, if you’re ever looking for a “married 2 years and a baby on the way” perspective, just holler.
January 13, 2011 5:39 am
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We’re interested! Send that sucker in!!
January 13, 2011 9:06 am
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I’ll start writing!
January 13, 2011 4:38 pm
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PS NICOLE! BABY! Just clicked through and realized which Nicole you were. Write, write, write. You’ll go in the “Wedding Graduates To Wives” folder. You were one of the first wedding grads, only fitting you should be one of the first of the new series.
January 13, 2011 5:49 pm
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Holy shitballs, I am so excited and proud of you. We will celebrate this next Saturday. Oh yes we will.
January 13, 2011 5:39 am
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Good, good, good, good.
I love it when the universe is like that. Way to go Meg!!!
January 13, 2011 5:39 am
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Congrats, congrats! As someone who has been a reader and a fan of APW from the start, I’m so excited for you, and for APW. And hey, if you’re ever looking for a “married 2 years and a baby on the way” perspective, just holler.
January 13, 2011 5:40 am
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Wow! Meg! What a kick. Congratulations to you and David on having the bravery and ovaries to make this happen!!!!
January 13, 2011 5:40 am
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absolutely love this “on having the bravery and ovaries” !!!
January 13, 2011 9:53 am
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Congrats, Meg! I know exactly how scary it can be to take that leap – but you are going to be crazy successful. I can’t wait to see where it takes you!
January 13, 2011 5:48 am
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Congratulations! I just ranted about the expensive weddings and how unnecessary they are. The success of your blog and site is an indication that people are planning for a marriage and life, not just a big party. I look forward to great things from you and your staff!
January 13, 2011 5:50 am
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Many congratulations Meg! I’m so very happy and excited for you!
January 13, 2011 5:51 am
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Congrats Meg! This is incredibly inspiring and courageous. I’m so looking forward to your reclaiming wife posts and I’m especially thrilled that you now get to focus your (obviously strong) work ethic on something you love!
January 13, 2011 5:54 am
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Congrats!
January 13, 2011 5:54 am
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What an awesome post to read first thing in the morning. Congratulations, you effing rock. You are living your dream, and you are consciously contributing to your happiness and your life. AMAZING.
January 13, 2011 5:55 am
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Congratulations and thank you for continuing to provide one of the best wedding websites there is.
January 13, 2011 5:56 am
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yay! good for you!
January 13, 2011 5:57 am
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Congratulations! Woo Hoo! I am so excited for you. I am leaving my job at the end of the month to go after my dreams too. It is such a boost to hear of more people doing the same. Hurrah!
January 13, 2011 6:00 am
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Wow. Long-time reader but I almost never comment but I think this post warrants it. Congrats to you for creating this incredible site and making it a viable option to earn a living from. I love APW, the message it sends to readers, especially us crazy brides trying to plan a wedding, is invaluable…Thanks for everything, Meg, you rock!
January 13, 2011 6:02 am
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Congratulations!
January 13, 2011 6:02 am
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This is so awesome! CONGRATULATIONS! Very very exciting news and I’m so happy I’m along for the ride to see what amazingness comes next!
January 13, 2011 6:03 am
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Wow! This is awesome, and inspiring.
Reading this blog has given me so many thoughts on what I want to do with my life, so different from the conventional.
Cheers to your big leap! Who knows, in the next few years, how many of us you might inspire to join you on the other side.
January 13, 2011 6:03 am
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Amazing news! Congrats on taking the leap, you are doing something big and brave, and I’m so excited for you!
January 13, 2011 6:11 am
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Hooray! I’m so so so happy for your and proud of you. You have guts lady. And you’ll make it and so will this website, because it has the best, kickass content out there by far.
January 13, 2011 6:12 am
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Way to go! From one 30 ish secretary to another. This hit close to home (in a great, kick-in-the-ass, inspiring sort of way).
January 13, 2011 6:13 am
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Yipes stripes! This is freaking AWESOME news!!!!!!!! So so so many congrats– can’t wait to see what the future of APW holds!
ps. I hope you are actually toasting us at work today. Just because you can. ;)
January 13, 2011 6:15 am
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Congratulations! This is amazing!
January 13, 2011 6:16 am
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I tee oh ell deee you so:)! Seriously, another thing you did very well Meg was ask the right people for advice and support. Not in a needy, pesky way, but so that we who were asked felt fortunate to be part of your project. We invested in you. And your success pays us off in spades. I am very happy to know you and for my place at the fire. Go you. Go APW. Go all you young women with these risks still to take.
January 13, 2011 6:18 am
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You know, the pay-it-forward attitude in this community gives me such hope for my future and for the future of the community of women. I feel that by banding together and supporting each other in the way that you clearly have for Meg and that Meg has for kids like me who are just starting this process themselves, it’s a giant f*ck you to a world that would rather have us in-fighting, acting petty and calling each other skanks.
I’m so proud of you Meg, and so grateful that your success allows me to have a place to feel smart, successful and listened to.
Yay ladypower.
January 13, 2011 7:18 am
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Wait, I can’t call you a skank? I am SO BUMMED. There goes your next sponsored post down the drain…
<3 You guys <3
January 13, 2011 9:16 am
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If you insist… :)
January 13, 2011 10:14 am
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Bwahahahaha.
January 13, 2011 3:32 pm
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Amen!!!
I used to be one of those uber-competitive people who thought that success and prosperity were finite resources. (I blame growing up in the heart-breakingly competitive world of professional ballet, where acceptance into summer programs, roles in performances, and acceptance into companies that might actually pay you to do what you’ve been training for are verrrrry scarce.) But discovering this community really turned my misinformed attitude around. DUH, there’s room enough on this planet for all of us to pursue our dreams—and I’m so thankful for a place where I can support and be inspired by smart women who are doing just that! (And admit to being a schmuck when I need to. )
January 13, 2011 9:21 am
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Congratulations!
January 13, 2011 6:18 am
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Way to go Meg! If anyone can do it, its you. Your writing is a joy to read and you have a real handle on knowing what people need to hear, and saying it clearly. You are building something important here! Keep up the good work.
January 13, 2011 6:19 am
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