Archive for November, 2011

Nov 2011

The Twitters!

As I'm sure most of you have noticed, since I finished the book in the spring (and after I took a small nap), we've been working like gangbusters around this joint to make APW more awesome. I might, in theory, have "Make APW More Awesome" taped to my bathroom mirror.* We've launched wordless weddings, we've done secret projects we are bringing you over the next two months, we've re-worked our editorial process, and while all this is phenomenally boring to read about, hopefully it makes you extra happy when you hang out around here, in a 'I can't put my finger on it' kind of way. (Full disclosure: if it does not make you feel happy, we are sorry. We did our best.)

Anyway! One of the big surprises and joys for me this year has been growing the APW staff (as well as having wonderful staffers grow and leave the nest, sniff). And because the APW staff is so awesome (Fun fact: all of them are ex-Theatre people. It's like I have some subconscious pull towards people who enjoy Kander & Ebb jokes), I wanted you to be able to get to know them all better. So! Today we're launching Twitter streams for all the APW staffers. There is:

PracticalWed (That's me, but you already knew that.) I twitter links to the day's post, general sass about weddings & marriage, babble about self employment, and make jokes about my life. I wish I twittered sass about politics (my number two passion), but I don't. Most of the time.
PracticalMaddie (That's Maddie, our Submissions Editor.) I might have hired Maddie because she's one of the funniest women I know. I couldn't say. But it's probably worth following her just for that. Also? She's about to drive across the country in her grand move to California, so I'm pretty sure those tweets will be good.
PracticalAlyssa (That's Alyssa, who writes Ask Team Practical, and is one of APW's longest running commenters, which is how I met her.) Alyssa tweets about your weddings and anniversaries, to cheer you on, as well as general Texan saucyness.
PracticalEmily (That's Emily, our advertising manger.) Emily is the one who's sure to say something impolitic, which you clearly don't want to miss. She's also who you should follow if you're a vendor, because she'll tweet stuff you want to know.
PracticalKate (That's Kate, our copy editor.) I've been trying to get Kate on Twitter since the dawn of APW, back in 2008. It turns out that all I had to do to make it happen was hire her, forcibly give her a Twitter handle, and then tell her I wouldn't pay her until she used it. That's it! I really don't know why I didn't think of it sooner, because it's totally working out for me.

But really, you should go follow everyone because, when I told the ladies we were getting Twitter handles, Alyssa told me, "If I can't talk about my vagina on here, I don't want it." So today we're talking about our vaginas. Obviously.

*Actually, I'm lying. I only tape financial goals to my bathroom mirror, like, "Make $XXXX so you can start a new site." I'm crazy.

Posted in: Entrepreneurship, Meg's Thoughts | 21 Comments »

Nov 2011

Wedding Graduates: Katie Jane & John

*Katie Jane, Elopement Photographer & John, Engineer at Etsy*

Today's wedding graduate post is one I've been waiting for, for a long long time. Katie Jane is a long time reader of APW who left a crazy joy filled comment from her honeymoon where she raved about her wedding and happened to mention the wedding photography business she was starting. One thing lead to another, and she's become one of APW's go-to elopement photographers in NYC. But today's post is about her wedding and, more importantly, about why we really get married and what it all means. It's about the impossible transience of our lives and why that makes the huge love of a wedding day matter. That, and the joy shining out of Our Labor of Love's pictures is absolutely palpable.

John and I got engaged on the first day of spring in 2009. We were watching TV when he turned to me and said, “Do you want to get hitched?” I thought he was kidding, “Yeah, right.” “No... seriously... do you want to get hitched?” “What? Are you serious?” He nodded. I started sobbing but somehow managed to say yes. The next day he took me out to pick a ring.

We love a good party, but we had little enthusiasm for wedding planning, so we started planning an elopement—Hawaii on our fifth anniversary: October 9, 2010. We were just going to run off and do it and it would be amazing.

Both our families were thrilled we’d decided to get married. They were not thrilled about being left out and had no problem letting us know. “Well, what if we just decide to go to Hawaii at the same time?” While John held fast, they started to get into my head. I worried I was going to be missing out on something huge.

A few months after we got engaged we were sitting on our terrace drinking beers, talking about the future. “I think I want a wedding,” I said, out of nowhere. John, who knows me so well, smiled, “I knew it was only a matter of time before our elopement became a wedding.” We talked about the good and bad of a wedding—he didn’t think “because I’m worried I’m missing out” should be our only reason for having one. We took a while to mull it over and finally came to the conclusion yes, we’d have a wedding, but we’d do it on our terms. And so it began.

Deciding to have a wedding didn’t make us suddenly interested in wedding planning. We decided to do it together, to prioritize what was important and not worry about the rest, to go with our instincts, and if something didn’t come together... oh well.

I designed our save the dates, invitations, menus, and programs myself. We had a friend who is an awesome DJ and booked him about a year before our wedding at a much lower cost than a typical New York City DJ. Our photographers gave us a deal on their travel expenses because they were already scheduled to be in New York City that weekend anyway. Since I could not have cared less about flowers or centerpieces, when John’s aunt offered to hire a florist, I told her to go for it. I wanted fall colors, but other than that, I didn’t care what anything looked like. (Giving up control and letting John’s aunt do that for us was one of the best decisions we made.) I found the perfect shoes for $20 online. A close family friend agreed to become ordained and officiate our wedding, so we didn’t have to have someone we didn’t know marrying us. Everything was coming together perfectly. Until it wasn’t. Continue reading Wedding Graduates: Katie Jane & John

Posted in: Wedding Graduates | 46 Comments »

Nov 2011

Dennis Pike Photography in New Jersey & New York

Today I'm delighted to introduce you to one of APW's newest sponsors, Dennis Pike Photography in New Jersey, New York City, and the Tri-State area. Looking through Dennis' body of work, I was first gobsmacked by how gorgeous it was and then was struck by how delightfully surprising it was. In a world of trendy wedding photography, his work stands out. It has a very particular voice, an art book quality, and a blend of photojournalism, detail work, and portrait work that's breathtaking.

And emotion. And composition. Can we talk about this shot for a second, because I'm more than a little bit obsessed with it. This, in one photo, is what wedding photography is all about.

But today's post is cooler than that. I'm not just writing a sponsored post for Dennis. Nope! I'm writing a post for him because Courtney & Rob, long time APW readers, and friends of Dennis, were so delighted by his work (that's them in the rain!) that they bought him an APW sponsorship as a gift. That's not only touching and exciting for me, it also an awesome character endorsement.

Courtney says, "Dennis shot our engagement photo session, and we absolutely love the moments he captured and couldn't have had more fun working with him on that rainy September day. Our decision to connect him with APW readers was simple: Dennis takes beautiful photos, he is a cherished friend, and we want to honor him for being there for us on our wedding day by helping his business grow. It's just that straightforward."

And Rob says, "Dennis' website shows he has a very uncommon quality in wedding photographers. Dennis' photos are not about fuzzy filters and sparkle. He shoots real people in real places. He shows that love is not always a ruby in a tall tower. Sometimes it's a diamond in the rough. "

Perfect, right?

And it makes sense that Dennis Pike Photography takes such intense and beautiful photographs, given Dennis' passion for photography. He told me, "Part of the reason that I love shooting weddings is the different types of photography I get to do every wedding day. I have a deep love for photojournalism, and a good portion of the day is photojournalistic coverage. I love to challenge myself to get great moments as they happen, but not just capturing the moment, but capturing it in an artistic was with great light."

"Aside from that, I love dramatic portraiture. I feel that a couple should get to look and feel like rockstars on their wedding day. I want my portraits of my couples to have a big "wow" factor. I pride myself on being able to do this quickly and in any lighting, weather or location situation. Obviously, the more time I have to make portraits with my couples the better. It gives me more time to explore a location, set up lights and do something truly unique. I am also a bit of a selfish photographer... I want every wedding I shoot to be the best one I have ever shot, and I am always, always, always shooting for my portfolio. This kind of selfishness works out well for my clients though, because I am always giving 100% and trying to outdo myself and be better every weekend."

"I'm always trying to find time to work on personal projects, but unfortunately they always seem to fall by the wayside. But I literally always have my camera with me just in case I see something photo worthy. Even if it's just driving down the street to get gas, I have my camera. Whenever my wife and I travel, the trips always take longer than they should, since I am pulling the car over every few hours to shoot photos of something. Photography truly is my passion."

Dennis is so excited to work with more APW couples (and I'm tremendously excited to see what kind of work you create together and the emotions and moments captured). Dennis says, "So far, my only experience with APW couples is with Courtney & Rob, but they embody the type of clients that I want. Fun, smart, have an appreciation for photography, unique. I like the idea of people doing their own thing for their wedding rather than falling into what they think a wedding should be. A wedding should reflect the couple, not something the media or the industry dictates."

To say I'm excited to see what comes of APW-ers in the Tri-State area working with Dennis Pike Photography is an understatement. His work is so unique, his prices are amazing (all inclusive wedding photography starts at $2,400, a miracle in crazy expensive New York City), and he's beyond excited to work with you. It's going to be good. I can tell already. Now let's make it happen....

This post includes Sponsors, who are a key part of supporting APW. For more information, see our Directory page for Dennis Pike Photography.

Posted in: Sponsored Posts | 8 Comments »

Nov 2011

Reclaiming Wife: The Unexpected Adventure

Have you ever had a panic attack at 30,000 feet? I've had two in the last month, and one this weekend led to a fairly interesting adventure. But let's back up.

I've never loved flying, but ever since I moved to New York City from Southern California at 18-years-old, I've done a fair amount of it. This year, however, what with it being my first year of self-employment, I've done a ton. I said yes to personal and professional travel, perhaps a tad too often, just because I could. Then this fall, it reached a critical mass. Since August, I've been on 15 flights (including two trans-Atlantic flights, which I actually don't mind as much), one long ferry ride, and two long train trips. On Wednesday, in the middle of traveling to see my Grandmother for Thanksgiving, my body decided rather suddenly at 30,000 feet that it was overwhelmed by life and done with plane travel. Last time this happened, I was traveling alone, and the stewardesses (God bless them) pulled me out of my seat, blew air in my face, put cold compresses on my neck, and proceeded to get me drunk so they didn't have to call in a medical professional. This time, I was traveling with my husband (God bless him) and my hands started shaking so hard I couldn't hold the drink he'd pressed into my hands (and I was already on anti-anxiety medication). To say it was unpleasant would be a small understatement.

When we landed, I turned to David and said, "I can't get on the next plane. Also, I clearly need treatment for my flying phobia." And, "But seriously, I can't get on the next plane." And that's when the foundation of what my marriage is started to play out. There I was, sobbing in the Phoenix airport. David said, "Are you sure you can't get on the plane? Because it's a short flight and I think you can probably do it." And I collapsed into tears again, and said, "I can't." He asked if I wanted to get a plane home. I said, "No," and croaked out, "I think we need to rent a car."

And my amazing husband nodded and said, "Ok. We need to rent a car," grabbed his iPhone, started searching, and then told me to grab my things. Let me tell you, you get some funny looks when you roll up to a rental counter in Phoenix at 10pm, sans reservation, and ask to rent a car and return it in San Francisco four days later.

The whole thing made me think about what marriage is. Life is a series of things you plan and things you hope for, followed by things going awry. Life is thinking you're going to have a short and comfortable flight to New Mexico, and ending up in pine-scented Flagstaff, in a hotel you picked because you were too tired to drive your rental car any further, with a wife looking rather green around the gills after a terrible panic attack. And the thing about marriage is that it gives you a partner to sob on, to plan with, and to drive the rental car, when you're shaking too hard to do it.

Continue reading Reclaiming Wife: The Unexpected Adventure

Posted in: Life, Marriage, Meg's Thoughts, Reclaiming Wife | 153 Comments »

Nov 2011

Wordless Wedding: Sam & Eric

* Sam & Eric * Photographer: Emily Takes Photos (APW Sponsor) * Soundtrack for reading: "Baby It's You" by Smith *

The Info—Photography: Emily Takes Photos (APW Sponsor) / Dress: Priscilla of Boston, scored new from Preownedweddingdresses.com (APW Sponsor) / Shoes: Kate Spade / Birdcage Veil: Twigs & Honey / Suit: Valentino, bought at Off Fifth / Shoes: DC / Venue: Palm Event Center

Other cool stuff: Eric designed the invitations and we had them printed by Aerialist Press in Emeryville.

One sentence sum up of the wedding vibe: Fun, festive, family, rock n roll and sparkles!

Favorite thing: That everyone we love was in one room for a night.

This post includes Sponsors, who are a key part of supporting APW. For more information, see our Directory pages for Emily Takes Photos and PreOwnedWeddingDresses.com.

Posted in: Wedding Graduates, Wordless Weddings | 30 Comments »

Nov 2011

Wedding Graduates: Hanna & Billy

*Hanna, Theatre Practitioner & Billy, Stage Manager*

Well here we are, back after the long weekend that is American Thanksgiving (hopefully after some naps, eating, and gratitude). Because we knew that a handful of you might be coming back newly engaged (APWers are non-traditional, but lots of you get engaged over the holidays), we thought we would kick off the season with a fabulous, gritty, and deeply emotional wedding. Hanna & Billy's English-wedding-by-way-of-Scotland was shot by Julie Kim, and it is stunning. But the real reason it's stunning has nothing to do with money spent or details crafted. With two theatre people at the helm, it's creative and beautiful and raw. Hanna talks about how their wedding was impractical, but it's actually deeply practical in the why-I-started-APW sense, because it's exactly right for the two of them. They didn't have the wedding they were told they had to have; they dreamed up the wedding they needed. And that's what APW is all about. For those of you newly engaged (or about to be over the holidays) may this help you dream up what you need, whatever form that takes.

There was nothing remotely practical about our wedding. I freely put up my hands and admit that we made it really difficult for ourselves. We knew that many of our choices were irrational, impetuous and hard for others to understand, but then again, if it is true that weddings should be a reflection of a couple at that given moment in time, then our wedding was certainly true to us and the journey we were on.

In fact, it's rather fitting that our guests have now nicknamed it ‘The Battle of the Somme’, favoring war-like adjectives to describe it. Epic, intense, poetic and muddy are a few that often pop up. If truth be told, every time I think about it I become impossibly exhausted, like I am running a marathon. Maybe that’s because I am a newlywed who is about as madly in love as is possible. Maybe it’s because getting our wedding on its feet took the superhuman all-night efforts of us and our closest friends. Or maybe it is because I am now writing this a million miles away from those people. The day after our wedding we packed our bags, dumped our suit and dress and moved half way across the world. Romantic yes, but not practical at all.

Billy and I got married on the 3rd of September 2011, on a remote beach, off the western coast of Scotland. For clarity's sake, neither of us are Scottish; we lived in London, as did virtually every single wedding guest. But for reasons which completely baffled our families, we decided to get married in a place about as remote as they come. For Billy and me, it was never the planning that was tough. Yes we had our fair share of introspection, soul searching and family dramas, but it was always going to be our wedding, done our way. You can neither get married outdoors or write you own vows in England so we upped sticks from London to Scotland where both are legal. We found a humanist celebrant who was happy to let us write the whole ceremony and didn't blink when her first draft was returned vitally unrecognizable. We persuaded fifty people that our remote converted cowshed was not that far from the city, that this would be the ultimate in leaving parties and that they would love to sleep in caravans for the weekend. Sounds like a bloody good adventure right? Well it was, but by God it was a lot of work, and for us it turned out that the wedding itself that was the most challenging and demanding of the whole experience.

We both work in theatre. We work to create beautiful moments, on a budget, for a living. A wedding is not too dissimilar to a theatre production. We were meticulous with planning our setting, lighting, soundscape and script. We knew our blank canvas of a cowshed was in need of some work but we planned its fit up with the uttermost care. We had our game faces on and were totally 100% in control of the task in hand. Then the inevitable happened. We got there, everyone we love arrived and we forgot about our game plan. We were so caught up in spending every last second with our guests that time ran away with us and before we knew it, we were swamped.

As with any theatre production, at some point you will inevitably work into the night to get the show up on its feet; this is a given. Where weddings and theatre diverge (as we quickly learnt) is when the people responsible for setting the stage are also required to remember their lines the next day. It was manic. Continue reading Wedding Graduates: Hanna & Billy

Posted in: Wedding Graduates | 34 Comments »

Archive for November, 2011

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