*Connie, Interactive Designer & Brian, Writer*
Today’s wedding graduate post is TheBest (all one word). First, there is a letter from the Groom to his past self, which is so good I was quoting it to everyone. Second, there is the discussion of how, when you’re trying really hard to have a low-stress wedding, you can often stress yourselves out… you know… trying to have a low stress wedding. And as my groom always reminded me during my wedding breakdowns, trying to have an affordable wedding and doing it all yourself is just hard. And that’s normal. So, let’s get ready for hilarious/awesome:
From the Groom:
Dear Pre-wedding Version of Me (You),
My goodness! Much as you might surmise, I am very relieved that the planning/pre-wedding stage of my (your) relationship with Connie (Connie) has finally come to an end. I now spend every day simply enjoying the act of being married to her, instead of spending every weekend and most weeknights preparing and shopping and checking and balancing and crafting and all of those tasks you are most certainly mired in.
But I want you to know something very important: everything you are doing, whether you are enjoying it in the moment or not, is completely worth every second. It came out fantastically, living up to and exceeding the image that I (you) had (have) in my (your) head about how it would turn out. Sure, there are things I should possibly tell you to change—a few invitees here and there, things not to bother retrieving because they really didn’t come into play in the actual proceedings—but as much as I may want to do so, you and I both know that this will cause a temporal paradox that will inevitably change the timeline as we know it, like making us have a robot president, or causing pedestrians to be randomly attacked by mutant grandmothers or something, and/or make the whole darn universe explode into tiny pieces.
The advice that I can give is this: keep your calm, and remain a rock amid rough seas. Know that the pressure she feels is put on herself by A) Her motivation to excel at crafty-type ventures and B) Her desire to outdo the events of everyone she knows, for all time. Understand that she also needs you (me) to show that you care as much as she does, despite that I (you) know you already do, so support her and be willing to get frazzled once in a while.
Remember that these days only exist because of how much you love one another, and not because you are thinking of buying a Goodwill and must constantly visit every one of them to assess their wares. Continue onward, and you (I) will one day enjoy the post-marital shenanigans that I (you) treasure every day and for all time!
From the Bride!
While we were getting ready for the wedding, in our respective rooms across from each other in our apartment, I opened a gift from Brian that perfectly summed up the entire wedding—a framed embroidery of Jessie Spano’s historical meltdown. I had been so frazzled up until that exact day that when I opened it, I almost started crying, much to the horror of my friend Melissa, who was trying to let my eyelashes dry.
We always told ourselves that we wanted our wedding to be as no-fuss as possible, as short as possible (we’re both severely shy about standing up in front of people, even if it’s dearly loved family and friends), and most importantly, drama-free.
We had seen enough episodes of (insert wedding-drama-related-show-title-on-the-WE-network) to know that we didn’t want screaming and crying to make up the year before our wedding. We still had our lives, and we wanted to look back fondly on the time planning our wedding.
Well, things like money, DIY-induced-stress (when friends offer to help you make things—oh fer the love of jeebus, say yes), and quitting your job weeks before the wedding happened. No matter how drama-less we tried to keep things, it didn’t lift the weight of the wedding off my shoulders.
What did help was having the most amazingly calm, rational, and helpful fiancé anyone could ask for, friends who were not only willing to lend an ear but also some hard manual labor hours, and a planner who never showed a bead of sweat while pulling together every little DIY idea you had in your head.
Yeah, it was worth it. You’d probably have to slap that smile off my face that day.
The Info—Photography: Michael Chan from The Image is Found / Venue: Marvimon House / Dress: Dolly Couture / Shoes: Vivienne Westwood + Melissa Shoes (Lady Dragon) / Hairpiece: Bando / Suit: Ben Sherman / Shoes: Cole Haan / Hair & Makeup: Melissa Krueger / DIY support: Michael’s & JoAnn Fabrics (only during the 50% off coupon days!)