* Karen Naimool, Anger Management Counselor for Children & Jenni Griffith, Program Manager at a Medical School & Doctoral Student * Photographer: A mix of close friends and the local press that showed up. Some of the best shots came from Stu Bayer who did an article about our ceremony for the Rivertowns Patch. * Soundtrack for reading: “Stars 4-Ever” by Robyn *
One sentence sum up of the wedding vibe: Queer femme pinup girl meets island ninja under a giant gay balloon arch with bubbles, giggles, and play!
A little about our wedding: Karen: Jenni and I are very different in terms of how we dress. I’m usually very low key and comfortable while Jenni is all about feathers, flowers, and vintage frocks. However, for our legal ceremony, we were both fancy! I found a champagne sari that complemented Jenni’s dress. I chose to wear traditional red bridal jewelry to represent my religion, Hinduism, and Indian Trinidadian culture. You can view some of our inspirations and ideas for our September Hindu wedding here on Pinterest.
Jenni: I had a Kate Spade dress sitting in my closet for a year, but I never found the right occasion to wear it. The polka dots and flared skirt remind me of the 1950s, which is my favorite era. I loved Valentino’s giant bow heels that came out a couple years ago but could not afford them. Luckily, Paris Hilton came out with this incredible knock off version in white! I adore birdcage veils, and I found this perfect white hat and veil at my favorite online store. I wanted our legal ceremony to be a queer spin on a traditional Western ceremony. Our September wedding will honor Karen’s Hindu religion and Indian culture.
Our ceremony took place at the Village Hall in the little Rivertown where we live, Dobbs Ferry, NY. We were the first legal same-sex marriage in the town of Dobbs Ferry, and it was extra special that our town mayor married us! After the ceremony, our incredible friends surprised us with a delicious lunch, champagne, and a slice of cake (with a candle on top) at our favorite local joint, Harper’s Restaurant. The restaurant harkens back to the 1950s and was the perfect setting for our impromptu reception!
Other cool stuff we should know about: We are a bi-racial and bi-national couple, which is difficult enough having to cross cultural and racial divides. However, our biggest challenge is proving to the world that we deserve to stay together as a family. We use our relationship, our love, and our family to fight DOMA, which makes it impossible for Jenni to sponsor Karen for U.S. citizenship. We don’t know whether Karen will ultimately be able to stay permanently in the U.S., but we are determined to make our story known and advocate for equality. Take a look at our website and some of our press.
Favorite thing about the wedding: Our Hindu wedding with all the pomp and ceremony will happen in September in New Jersey, which does not recognize same-sex marriage. So, we decided to have a legal ceremony in our home state of New York before the big gay Hindu wedding. We were (and still are) focused on planning our wedding in September but then found out in late February that our mutual friend and matchmaker, Alysia, would be in NYC in March. Alysia and Karen are best friends who attended Spelman College together. Alysia and Jenni were friends through graduate school. Alysia spent the better part of two years trying to get us together despite our refusals. She was convinced we were a perfect match and turned out to be right! All that hard work could not go unnoticed. We decided that it would be fitting to have a simple legal ceremony with Alysia as our witness while she was visiting NYC. Alysia was a part of both of our individual lives and the catalyst for our love. It made our legal commitment to each other even more meaningful to have Alysia witness our commitment as a wedded couple. Our legal ceremony is probably the best “I told you so” we ever had. Our ceremony at Village Hall turned out to be amazing and felt like a full-blown wedding even though it was somewhat impromptu.
this is such a wonderful, beautiful wedding! I can’t tell who’s joy is more infectious- Karen, Jenni or Alysia’s! So so joy-filled.
April 11, 2012 9:39 am
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Or the little kid. IS HE CRYING OR LAUGHING? I don’t know, but I love it!
April 11, 2012 10:38 am
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I know! and the proud Mayor! there is such good rich FEELINGS FEELINGS FEELINGS here. I love it
April 11, 2012 10:58 am
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I didn’t even notice that Josh looks like he’s balling!! He’s actually cracking up because he dropped his cello on accident. The boys practiced “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” every night for one week because they said “Karen and I are shooting stars.” So. Damn. Cute.
April 11, 2012 12:16 pm
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Everything about this is fantastic! Congrats you two! Well done, Alysia!
April 11, 2012 9:41 am
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We sent Alysia a edible arrangement a couple years ago as a “thank you” gift. Seriously, we owe her SO MUCH MORE!
April 11, 2012 12:17 pm
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Beautiful!!! I love how your outfits complemented each other, and the rainbow balloon arch, and the kids playing their instruments–too cute! I can’t wait to see photos of your big Hindu wedding. Please come back with a second post!
April 11, 2012 9:42 am
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THEY BETTER. Right?
April 11, 2012 10:41 am
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It’s rare to find a champagne sari, and we has no idea whether it would complement my dress while shopping in Queens. I’m very happy it worked out! The rainbow balloon arch was a surprise from our friend Doug ( who likes to call himself our LQBF or Local Queer Best Friend). We were shocked when we pulled up to Village Hall. It was a beautiful moment. Thanks for all the love and excitement.
April 11, 2012 12:21 pm
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There goes my afternoon stalking you guys on the internetz. Holy awesomesauce!
April 11, 2012 10:15 am
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Hahahaha! I’m totally an internet stalker myself so I can appreciate the time warp!
April 11, 2012 1:33 pm
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I love the dresses and how they work together while still maintaining each ladies style. And the happy expressions on everyone’s faces- especially Alysia. I love seeing invested family and friends.
And I really love the expression on the face of the girl photo bombing the kiss at the end!
April 11, 2012 10:47 am
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Karen and I are so different in almost all aspects (race, ethnicity, religion, culture, country of origin, personality, passions, etc.), and we really want to celebrate our individuality at both the legal ceremony and our September wedding. Who we are as individuals is what makes our love and relationship magical.
Our friends and community are so supportive of our family. The photo of Annie’s face as we kiss is priceless!! She announced to her friends last week that she saw “two ladies get married!”
April 11, 2012 12:33 pm
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Oh my gosh, I totally missed that and had to go back and check the post! Priceless!
April 11, 2012 5:59 pm
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Love this! So much joy. Wish you all the best and can’t wait to see updates from the big bash in September. (Hint, hint.)
April 11, 2012 11:03 am
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Hahaha, it really touches us that the APW ladies are so excited about our little gay ceremony AND our September wedding. xo
April 11, 2012 12:37 pm
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such a great example of how long we still have to go for marriage equality, but also celebrating the progress that has been made so far. cant wait for the big, gay Hindu wedding post :)
April 11, 2012 11:09 am
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Unfortunately, we have a long road ahead of us as a society. DOMA forces thousands of same-sex binational couples to live in exile abroad. Karen had to leave the country for a month this year, and we had no idea whether she would ever be able to come back. Luckily, all the immigration issues were sorted out because we have access to immigrations attorneys who specialize in LGBT cases. However, many couples are not able to afford LGBT immigration attorneys. We are the lucky ones. I’m so happy we were able to get legally married in NY, and I look forward to the day when I can sponsor Karen for U.S. citizenship.
April 11, 2012 12:43 pm
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Oh my goodness, this makes my heart so full. Thank you so much for sharing.
April 11, 2012 11:15 am
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Thanks for the love, Helene!
April 11, 2012 1:32 pm
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The pictures of the kidlets providing the music just made my heart melt. Possibly the best job for a child in a wedding, ever.
Also, your wedding is gorgeous (but I hope you already knew that.)
April 11, 2012 11:25 am
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Totally the best job for a child!!! Jadon and Josh were over the moon about sharing their string skills with everyone! We plan to have more violin performances at the September wedding.
Thank you for the love. We never expected the legal ceremony to be this lovely. Our wonderful friends and community made it happen.
April 11, 2012 12:45 pm
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Oh my gosh, the one of y’all giggling and the mayor fist-pumping is DELIGHTFUL! Both of you were simply luminous. Echoing the demand for another post after September’s Hindu ceremony. Yay!!
April 11, 2012 12:05 pm
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The mayor was such a hoot!! He is a big, macho, white, straight dude, and he was so excited to perform the legal ceremony! The fist pump was the signal he created for Alysia to “bring forth the rings.”
April 11, 2012 1:15 pm
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This was awesome. Besides the fact that it was a gay wedding, it had a ballon arch. A BALLOON ARCH!
YOu ladies rock. Tis all.
April 11, 2012 12:26 pm
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The rainbow balloon arch was so rad! It was awesome to drive up to our little Village Hall and see this massive balloon arch. The balloon arch then traveled to the front of our home after the ceremony, and all our neighbors were commenting for weeks about how much they loved it. I wish it were permanent!
April 11, 2012 1:19 pm
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What a beautiful post, you guys! I’m sitting here grinning with my eyes tearing up. Love it.
(The kid with the dropped instrument facepalm is KILLING ME.)
April 11, 2012 12:38 pm
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You really can’t go wrong with kids + instruments at a wedding. It’s bound to be a recipe for pure awesomeness!
April 11, 2012 1:26 pm
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I love everything about this wedding! Amazing matching outfits, your matchmaker being your witness, the Mayor, all the love! I love it! Exclamation marks galore!!! And one more!
April 11, 2012 12:40 pm
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Thanks for the love, Amy!
April 11, 2012 1:31 pm
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I was grinning by the time I got to the end – joyful!
Congrats both and I can’t wait to see part 2!
April 11, 2012 12:55 pm
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Thank you, Laura! We’re really excited about our Hindu wedding.
April 11, 2012 1:36 pm
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I just love your big smiles in every one of your pictures! So much love and happiness! Congratulations!
April 11, 2012 12:56 pm
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Karen and I never thought we would be able to get legally married in the U.S. It’s only this year that our attorney told us we were “allowed” to get married in NY without immigration penalties. Our friends watched us struggle and fight to stay together as a family. Getting legally wed was a culmination of years of strife and anxiety. Of course, the battle continues, but at least we can do after declaring our forever love to our friends and the interwebs!
April 11, 2012 1:43 pm
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This made me smile so damn hard. Thank you for sharing, congrats, and thank you for spreading the word about these very, VERY important issues. The very best to you and can’t wait for the second post after the September wedding!
April 11, 2012 12:59 pm
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Thank you for caring about our little family and marriage/immigration equality. I really believe that we can change things by spreading love and acceptance.
April 11, 2012 1:45 pm
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The Brides’ big, beautiful smiles!!!! Once I peeled my eyes away from the awesome rainbow arch, I saw those beautiful smiles in every photo. Congratulations & best wishes~
April 11, 2012 1:23 pm
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Thanks so much! We are over the moon about being married!
April 11, 2012 1:49 pm
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Ahhh! I’m crying. I’m literally crying.
First, CONGRATULATIONS!
Second, as the twin sister of my gay twin, it is so damn Good to see this. My twin is at the point they don’t consider marriage, long term partnership, etc. as even a possibility (they live in the southern/midwestern US). So GOOD.
Third, I think that if for just a minute that we as heterosexual couples did not take for granted our ability to marry at a whim, there would be more weddings brimming over with this beautiful, simple, complex, awesome, Joy.
April 11, 2012 1:42 pm
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Thank you for the love, Sara.
I’m touched that you are so supportive of your gay twin sister. I’m sure it means a lot to her. It’s very unfortunate that many places in the U.S. are a threatening and even deadly place for LGBTQ people.
APW is our little corner to create a space where hetero and LGBTQ people can explore and celebrate marriage. We are making more meaningful marriages by participating in this dialogue.
April 11, 2012 1:56 pm
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Thank you for sharing! And I agree – APW was a great source for me to share with my twin.
PS I live in North Carolina right now, and as I’m sure you’re aware, there is a HUGE vote coming up on May 8th. Doing what we can to prevent that terrible, terrible amendment from passing…
April 11, 2012 2:00 pm
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Yes, I am aware of Amendment One. My friend, Aly, wrote a beautiful blog post about how this will affect her family: http://embracerelease.com/2012/04/08/232/
Thank you for the support. Hopefully, this bogus amendment will not pass.
April 12, 2012 6:48 am
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Gorgeous, adorable, LOVE THEM.
April 11, 2012 2:03 pm
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And Facebook tells me you’re friends. HOW ARE ALL YOU COOL LADIES FRIENDS? I imagine there is a clubhouse somewhere, and if I’m really nice, I’ll be invited in for tea one day.
April 11, 2012 2:11 pm
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Ha! Yes, it’s true. Jamie, Aly, and I are queer lady friends from Atlanta. We will totally tell you the password to the clubhouse.
April 11, 2012 6:21 pm
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PASSWORD TO THE CLUBHOUSE. Day, MADE.
April 12, 2012 9:43 am
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You know that horrible joke about how gay marriage should be legal so “they” can be miserable with the rest of us? Hardy-har-har-har? Okay, well that, only with immigration issues.
I would love for you ladies to be able buy a ticket for the terrible journey that is going through the immigration process. Because it can be difficult, frustrating, and awful, and you should be able to be miserable with the rest of us.
April 11, 2012 2:15 pm
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I really wish I had a magic wand to wish away the immigration nightmare! Hopefully, DOMA will be overturned soon and these times will be a distant memory. In the meantime, I try to enjoy the everyday bliss of my little family.
April 11, 2012 6:29 pm
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The thing I hate about Wordless Weddings is you don’t always get the details behind it – I love the extra bit of info about both of you and about both your weddings. BUT I would a) Like to know if the little boys are laughing or crying and b) what your officiant was saying when he raised his fist and y’all are making cute faces at each other.
There is so much happiness and joy in these photos, and what I like the very best is all these kids blowing bubbles and celebrating with you. Things like this – people raising their children to be happy about love in whatever form it takes- brighten my day.
ETA – well scratch that, lady – your comments filled in the blanks I wanted to know about! Now I like this whole post even better ;)
April 11, 2012 3:34 pm
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I’m glad I answered your questions! Yay! The children in our community are as important as the adults. They are an integral part of our lives, and we want to highlight them in both our legal ceremony and September wedding. Some of the comments from the parents are in this article from a local newspaper: http://www.nygec.org/uploaded_documents/Griffith.pdf Most of the parents at our legal ceremony were heterosexual and are committed to raising loving, accepting children. I have hope that the next generation will make the world a more beautiful, open place for EVERYONE.
April 12, 2012 6:34 am
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Gorgeous. GORGEOUS! Congratulations, and much, much luck dealing with all the legal and immigration bullshit!
April 11, 2012 4:02 pm
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Thank you, Ashley! Fingers crossed.
April 12, 2012 5:56 am
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so freaking cute!! i got to see a hindu wedding ceremony for myself last september and they’re super awesome!
congratulations!
and for those of you who want DOMA repealed you should be furiously emailing your congressmen and telling them that you want the RESPECT FOR MARRIAGE ACT of 2011 to reach the floor and get passed! the respect for marriage act has sponsors and is floating around the House and needs to be brought to the forefront.
April 11, 2012 4:46 pm
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Our Hindu wedding will be my first, and I can’t wait! I’ve been reading about the wedding ceremony, watching videos, and reading books. Hinduism is a beautiful religion, and I’m looking forward to participating in all the rituals. I’m not religious at all, but I’m grateful that my partner practices Hinduism. She brings a calmness and peace to our family that comes from practicing yoga and meditation her entire life.
We’re going to be the first same-sex Hindu wedding to actually take place IN a temple. The pundit, temple, and community have been very kind and accepting of our family.
Thank you for mentioning the Respect for Marriage Act! Yes! I hope it gets passed.
April 12, 2012 6:07 am
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I love, love, love the dresses! Everything about this wedding is makes me so happy.
April 11, 2012 6:53 pm
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Thank you!! I wasn’t sure if the color would make me look pale as a ghost, but I think it all worked out. The champagne color definitely looks gorgeous with Karen’s cinnamon skin color!
April 12, 2012 6:08 am
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AMAZING! I LOVE IT ALL!!!! Congrats!!
I’m sure the newlyweds know about this awesome organization, but if it hasn’t gotten a shout-out here or anywhere on APW yet, it should:
http://www.immigrationequality.org/
April 12, 2012 5:52 am
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Thank you, Diana! Karen and I are very involved with Immigration Equality. They are a wonderful organization. Also, Out4Immigration: http://www.out4immigration.org
April 12, 2012 6:10 am
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[...] ♥ Georgeous peony and floral wedding inspiration ♥ A stunning yellow & blue wedding ♥ This simple lesbian wedding is just beyond ♥ Fancy a plum wedding palate? ♥ Good girls go to heaven, bad girls go to Vegas (oh yes we did! [...]
April 12, 2012 7:01 am
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So so so brimming with joy for you! I was trying not to both laugh and cry on the train at the same time.
This post also reminds me we need an APW clubhouse in NYC. Somewhere we can meet up in person to lead change on these real topics (and have some laughs too)! Actually, can our clubhouse be upstate so we can take a breather from the city? :)
April 12, 2012 9:12 am
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YES, APW Clubhouse in upstate NY with tea parties (or martini parties depending on how we’re feeling), book club, bitch fests, and bon bons!!
April 12, 2012 9:52 am
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Hahaha! So good. If the upstate ladies ever need a change of pace, we can hold the club down in Brooklyn :)
April 12, 2012 11:01 am
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I love Brooklyn and am totally down with a rotating clubhouse!! :)
April 12, 2012 11:10 am
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I have not read one bit of this post or comments…yet. I just have to say that ANYONE doing anger management with kiddos is A+ in my book! As a therapist/LPA, you must have all the patience in the world. Congrats to you and your lovely bride!
April 12, 2012 7:39 pm
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Karen works at a residential treatment facility for abused, neglected, and displaced boys. I don’t know how she does it. She impresses me everyday with her love and devotion for those children. It has to be the hardest job EVER. Thanks for the love!
April 15, 2012 9:03 am
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[...] love this lesbian wedding- it’s so [...]
April 13, 2012 4:54 pm
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I keep coming back to the wedding, i think because there is something so pure, so fun… you can tell they are truly each others best friends. They both look so relaxed and coming from a bride who is weeks away from my own wedding, this is calming, to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Weddings are fun, these two are definitely enjoying the ride:)
June 13, 2012 2:56 pm
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I hope your wedding day is magical and everything you want it to be!
June 26, 2012 10:32 am
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Love the Hindu representation! Gorgeous sari, too. I love how the dresses match so well.
August 14, 2012 1:06 pm
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Karen looked STUNNING in her sari! Thanks for the love!
August 15, 2012 6:05 am
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