APW Happy Hour

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HI APW!

Four-day weeks, right? They’re only four days, but somehow they feel like the punishment for the three-day weekend as we try to cram five days of work in to a few short days. The APW staff is, by and large, pretty exhausted, and I think we need the weekend to pull ourselves together. Ha. We’re still all recovering from the hurricane that was last week (behind the scenes shot of our three-day shoot above, more coming at you very, very soon), not to mention the joy of the first long summer weekend.

My family is getting (just) outside of town for the weekend, where I plan to lie in the sun and sleep it off. What are you guys up to?

And! A reminder! If you’re getting married and you want to show off a picture or two with the APW crowd, tag it as #APWwedding on Instagram, so we can see it to repost it on APW’s Instagram feed. Joy parade!

It’s your open thread, hop on! But first, your link roundup. We have a special section this week for the best articles about #yesallwomen and the horror at UCSB last weekend.

XO,
MEG

Highlights of APW This Week

Simple tips for writing your wedding vows. (Tip number one: get started now, not the week before the wedding.)

The coolest and simplest braid trick you’ve ever seen.

Veil roundup! For when you decide veils don’t have to be a patriarchal conspiracy.

Should we honeymoon now instead of later? YES. (And yes, turning off your phones and your computer and staycationing totally counts.)

Rachel’s wedding! Worth reading, again and again.

If you only knew how miraculous we are. #yesallwomen

Help us help you solve your wedding problems!

Should we honeymoon, or save money?

Link Roundup

Let’s, like, demolish laundry. The best (and most fun to read) article I’ve seen on the current tech bubble. And… laundry apps. Not joking. Are we surprised it’s all men trying to solve laundry like it’s a puzzle?

The faith journey of a square peg in a round hole.

“If you don’t like what people are saying about you, then change the conversation.” Angelina Jolie’s perfect PR game. (If, like me, you’re a media addict, this is a fascinating must read.)

I’ll be making time this weekend to read “The Case for Reparations.” Fun fact: my favorite course in college was about societal recovery after atrocity, and I have huge books about reparations on my shelf.

We’ve all pre-ordered Amy Poehler’s book, yes?

Bring back Reading Rainbow! Okay, yes, it’s already funded, but you know you want them to have an awesome budget to bring back this amazing show. (Note: I didn’t have a TV growing up, but the rest of the staff collectively wrote the last sentence.)

And I’m glad I didn’t join the internet snarking on Kimye’s upcoming wedding, because y’all? Those few photos we’ve seen are GORG. And sweet. <3 girlfriend.

#YesAllWomen

“Fifteen Must-Read #YesAllWomen Tweets.”

“It’s not all men. But it’s men.”

Let the record reflect, this is not okay.

“How many times do they have to tell us before we believe them?”

We have work to do: #yesallwomen and the Web.”

“The constant barrage of sexism women face.”

Your Princess Is In Another Castle: Misogyny, Entitlement, and Nerds.”

And, somewhat related. A French short film tries to illustrate to men what it feels like to be a woman.

APW’s 2014 Happy Hours are sponsored by Monogamy Wine and Promisqous wine. Thank you Monogamy and PromisQous for helping make the APW mission possible! if you want to learn more about monogamy (and possibly win birthday treats), head over here and sign up for their newsletter.

Roundup: Wedding Veils

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If you’ve ever gone wedding dress shopping or watched an episode of Say Yes to the Dress, you know that when you get close to finding the right dress the sales consultant will quickly slip a veil on your head in an effort to complete the “bridal look” (and close the sale). If you’re me, they may even tell you something like, “Eighty-five percent of men surveyed identified the veil as the biggest signifier of a woman looking like a bride”—which is pushy, bizarre (are these men trying to identify brides in a police lineup?), and I’m pretty sure completely made up. If you’re me, you went into dress shopping completely set on getting a tiny, practical, not-too-bridey birdcage veil, so maybe you spend a few minutes laughing with your best friend over the full-length cathedral veil and blusher currently on your head. You look like a Magazine-Ad Bride or a Movie Bride, not a Real-You Getting-Married Bride.

But then, a few months later, after the dress has been purchased and fitted, the ceremony written and the reception details finalized, you have a dream about your wedding day. In the dream, you’re standing outside of yourself, watching your ceremony. And when you see yourself, you’re wearing a veil. So maybe, if you’re me, you go out shopping again and find an elbow length veil trimmed in sparkly crystals and this time when you put it on with your dress, you really do feel like a Real-You Getting-Married Bride.

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The veil was initially (for whatever reason) a symbol to me of a frou-frou traditional bride who wanted to be a princess on her wedding day. It was a symbol of everything about being a bride that I didn’t want to be. But over time, as our engagement progressed, I became more comfortable with the fact that I got to define what kind of bride I wanted to be; I wasn’t defined by what I put on my head. So I chose to put a sparkly veil on my head and on my wedding day I looked exactly how I had wanted (literally) in my dreams.

With that in mind, here is a roundup of veils that (really) don’t suck, for those of you who have suddenly decided that a veil won’t make you part of some patriarchal veil-selling conspiracy, but will instead make you awesome.

1.  Juliette Cap Veil by JulesVeils via Etsy ($99 and up for cap and veil) 2.  Draped Tulle Veil by sibodesigns via Etsy ($225) 3. Chapel-length Lace Veil by sibodesigns via Etsy ($295) 4. Drew Veil by Sara Gabriel via Bella Bleu Bridal ($157) 5. Charisse Veil by Sara Gabriel via Bella Bleu Bridal ($157) 6. Ellen Cathedral Veil by Wedding Belles New York via Nordstrom ($115) 7. Mantilla Veil by SmithaMenonbridal via Etsy ($105 and up) 8. Kate Veil by Sara Gabriel via Bella Bleu Bridal ($277) 9. Dotted Fingertip Veil by MelindaRoseDesign via Etsy ($250) 10. Beaded Scallop Juliet Veil by danani via Etsy ($230)

Editor’s Note: You’ll notice most of these veils are from Etsy. If you see something you like, but it’s not quite there, lots of Etsy sellers are happy to create a custom piece for you. Just ask!