Are You Paying A Marriage Tax?

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It’s tax day. And to celebrate (is celebrate the right word?) the New York Times came out with a fascinating interactive graphic about the so-called marriage penalty or marriage bonus. In short, in the United States, we’ve built a tax system that rewards marriage… if one person earns the bulk of the income, while the other person stays home. This goes double once you have kids. The New York Times outlines it this way:

The largest marriage penalties fall on couples on either end of the income spectrum — poor or affluent — as well as on couples in which the two people are making similar amounts of money. … In marriages without children, the largest bonuses, in percentage terms, occur when couples have income just under $100,000 and only one earner. These couples pay about 7 percent of their income, or $7,000, less in taxes than they would if they were forced to file as two single individuals.

And worse:

The largest marriage penalties are for those who earn around $17,000, split evenly. These couples pay about 4 percent of their income, or $700, more in taxes than they would if they were allowed to file as two single individuals.

While this chart is fascinating (and at least in our case, painful), it makes me think about my perspective on taxes, and what we reward (and don’t).

Though it’s generally used as a political slur, I jokingly call myself a “tax and spend liberal.” Because yup, I believe in paying taxes so that we all have things like good public schools, and roads, and a social safety net. I remind myself of this monthly, since as a small business owner I pay gaspingly large tax bills on the regular. I also generally feel that the packages of rights that have been allowed to me as a married person are worth paying for, at least given that I can afford to pay for them. (With my Facebook feed filled with joyful notes from long married LGBTQ friends who are finally being allowed to pay a marriage penalty, I have been spending some time pondering both injustice and gratitude.)

But when it comes to the fact that the tax code is, effectively, penalizing me for being a co-equal earner to my spouse? And then penalizes me further for being a co-equal earner, who’s also a working mother? Well, that’s the part where I start to see red. Or green, really, given what that particular choice costs us.

Which made me want to open the floor to all of you. How fascinating (and/ or painful) is this graphic? How do you feel about how our tax code approaches marriage, breadwinning, and parenting?

How To DIY Neon Edged Napkin Place Settings

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Here’s my favorite general rule about wedding decor: don’t put too much time or money into things that people are only going to interact with after they’ve had a glass (or three) of champagne. I know the wedding industry wants you to think otherwise, but at that point, most people are just happy to be hanging out at a party. And well, they’re not exactly paying attention to your carefully crafted decor items. The good news is, table settings (and more specifically, linens) are usually an easy way to add some color to your wedding… and get a great big notice before people are tipsy. Since your guests are going to spend the first few minutes of walking into the reception doing the awkward shuffle where they try to find out what to do next, a lot of them will stop at their tables first, look down and go, “Oh isn’t that lovely.” Which is all you can ever really ask for out of a craft project.

Since table decor is usually a short-lived thing (after that first glance, most people are going to be shoving things aside for food after sitting down), we’re strong advocates for projects that will give you maximum pretty for minimal effort. We saw these super high design neon napkin place settings online last year (for an eightieth birthday party, natch), and have been trying to figure out how to create an easy and affordable version ever since. We asked Brooklyn wedding designer Michelle Edgemont if she could come up with a low-effort hack that would give you all the hip minimal neon awesomeness even if you don’t have a pile of money and unlimited time on your hands (which, sigh, isn’t that always the case?). Here’s what you’ll need:

Supplies:

DIY Neon Edged Napkin Tutorial

STEPS

  • Lay the Kraft paper or newspaper on your work surface to protect it.
  • Lay a napkin flat. You’ll only be spraying one corner of the napkin.
  • Place the cardboard on top of the napkin, leaving half an inch of the bottom and right edges exposed
  • Spray the paint along the bottom and right edge of the napkin. The whole edge doesn’t need to be painted, but be sure that at least three quarters of the length of it is. That’s a fraction of the work, and a hundred percent of the result: #lazygirl approved!
  • Let dry! (For a permanent dye, throw in the dryer for twenty minutes or iron your napkins to heat set the color.)

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You can totally leave your napkins as is, but if you’re planning on doing assigned seating, this printable wrap place card is quick and easy. Here’s how to make it:

NAPKIN WRAP PLACE CARD

  • Download the printable template. Open in Word.
  • Type in each guest’s name.
  • Print out and cut along the dashed lines.
  • Make a pile of black and white confetti on your work surface.
  • Put a piece of double stick tape on each place card to the left of the name.
  • Dip the place card into the pile of confetti, making sure it covers the double stick tape.
  • Wrap around the napkin and tape in the back.

Editor’s note: If you live in New York and aren’t a fan of DIY, you can always hire Michelle to make awesome projects like this for you. I know, magic.