Marble Rye Photography Serves Up Soulful Wedding Photos

WHO: Melissa of Marble Rye Photography

WHY: Melissa’s photos aren’t glossy and perfect. They’re deep and soulful, and a little worn in the elbows like your favorite jacket. Which is basically how I would describe Melissa herself (less the worn in the elbows). A loyal APW reader since 2009, everything about Marble Rye Photography was created to reflect you and your values. So while Melissa is one hell of a talented photographer, her work is never focused on perfection… even though she gets pretty damn close. At this point, eighty percent of the weddings Melissa shoots are APW weddings, because she just gets you (and I don’t have to tell you how important that is).

WHERE/HOW MUCH: To keep things simple, Melissa offers one package, which has way more stuff than any wedding photography package should have, but there you go. For $3,200 you get eight hours of coverage with both Melissa and a second shooter, a hardcover album, an online gallery of high-resolution images, and an engagement session (that’s transferable to absolutely anything—a boudoir shoot, your welcome dinner, or your grandparents’ anniversary gift). Marble Rye Photography offers free travel throughout the whole state of California (though she’s based in Venice, California) and for everywhere else in the country, travel is simply at cost.

The first time I met Melissa of Marble Rye Photography, she was in my living room listening to Meg, myself, and a few other APW sponsors give a workshop on building your business. She had been working two waitressing jobs to save up money for photography equipment and classes, and then traveled all the way up from LA just to hear us talk. Fast forward three years, and Melissa’s portfolio has changed and grown so much I almost wouldn’t recognize it, but Melissa is the same old Melissa: all hustle and kindness, which is basically the two qualities you want in a wedding professional. Here’s what Melissa had to say about how her relationship with APW has grown all these years (it made me cry, so do with that what you will):

I found APW in 2009. I caught the tail end of Meg’s wedding planning and watched a community full of strong, sweet women grow within the comments—roots digging into soil beneath her writing and reader weddings. I wasn’t planning a wedding then. I just came by every day to read smart female-driven content and the conversations it created. And I’m still here.

I found my ideal clients—APW couples—long before I became a wedding photographer. My values as a business owner, and as a wedding vendor, have been profoundly shaped by the thoughtful perspectives I’ve come across on the site. The way I see it, weddings are for standing up and celebrating your commitment to your partner, first and foremost. And they’re a day for you to graciously thank your community, and for your community to graciously give you their support, and love. Lots of times they’re a day for a dance party (and sometimes, of course, they’re not).

This wedding of yours? It’s happening once. I’m here so you can see what the people you love are witnessing—a big promise being made between you and your Person. And I’m here so you can see what is happening all around you—the people you love celebrating with each other. Dancing like crazy. Crossing cultural divides. Squeezing each other, whispering “I’m so happy for them,” and “I am, too.” These are the moments I’m after.

Melissa, on top of being someone you want to make friends with, just she gets weddings. She understands that they’re about moments big and small. Which is why her calling card isn’t in details of the traditional sort, but in the details that exist in moments like this:

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But part of the reason her package includes a second shooter is so that you don’t sacrifice the bigger picture for those details:

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Melissa isn’t just here for the photos though. Everything from her business philosophy to her package pricing is rooted in making sure your experience working with her is the best experience it can be. She says:

Most importantly, I want you to know that I come to the table with a deep respect for customer service. I’m going to anticipate your needs. I’m going to anticipate the needs of your partner, and of your wackiest family member. And if you start to feel overwhelmed or stressed by the excitement of the day, I am going be able to calm you down. It’s just something I know how to do. It’s probably the part of who I am that I am most proud of.

I’m consistently impressed by how far Marble Rye Photography has come since my living room. But it’s growing into something beautiful that I’m proud to have been a part of, and it’s only getting better with each year. Plus, you’ll be hard pressed to find a wedding photographer this good, offering eight hours of coverage with a second shooter and an album for $3,200. In fact, I don’t even know why you’re still here. Go hire Melissa yesterday.

Marble Rye Photography offers full-day wedding coverage throughout the whole state of California, for just $3,200. Click here to get in touch with Melissa today!

Wedding Guest Lightning Round: When You Want Them, and When You Don’t

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Q: We decided to do a small dinner with close friends and family instead of the hundred-plus person summer event. The ceremony will be at city hall the day before. We’re budgeting for twenty to twenty-five people at a nice restaurant.

One of the guests, my partner’s cousin and his husband, has RSVP’d and indicated that they have to leave early because of prior plans (a play). I’m annoyed since we have really limited space and it’s going to be pretty obvious if they leave. Also if they “half show,” it means we can’t replace them with someone else we would love to have there. I want to write them and explain this as tactfully as possible. Maybe something like, “We’d be thrilled to have you join us, this is a small event, if you can’t fully attend we can certainly celebrate together another time that may be more convenient.” I really don’t know how to address this, if at all, in a way that doesn’t come off as passive aggressive or petty.

I feel I’m going to be resentful watching them walk out the door knowing that we spent $200 to have them come get a drink or wolf down the entree and jet.

-Nat

A: Dear Nat,

It sounds like your partner’s cousin isn’t taking your wedding seriously because it’s not fitting the usual format. Maybe I’m wrong and he’s the sort of guy who leaves weddings early for plays all the time. But it doesn’t seem likely.

It’s irritating that he’s thinking of skipping out midway, but there is a good chance he’s being unintentionally thoughtless. Perhaps he doesn’t realize that this restaurant dinner isn’t just a party, it’s your wedding reception. Maybe he isn’t aware just how small the guest list is and how many friends you cut to make room for him. So, call him and let him know. (No emails. Always avoid emails when you’re trying to avoid coming off as passive aggressive.)

Tell this cousin just what you said above, taking extra care to emphasize the parts about the super small guest list, and about wanting to see him (just maybe when he isn’t rushing off somewhere else).

He may be offended; he might feel slighted. But he’ll probably get over it and enjoy his play.

Q: Several years ago I developed a close relationship with a family, and a closer relationship with a young man in the family around my age. His parents didn’t know that we were essentially dating and also sleeping together for the better part of two years. I am very close with his parents, who cared for me through a couple major illnesses (including a bed-ridden illness). Not only did his parents not know about our relationship, but we were not public with it, so only some of my closest friends know about the details of what ended up being an emotionally abusive relationship.

Now I am getting married (yay!) to a wonderful man, and we are still very close with this family (specifically the parents of this family). We absolutely want to invite them to the wedding, as they have done so much for us (and continue to do so) and we love them so much. The concern, however, is that we don’t want to invite their son due to his and my past. I don’t want to be reminded of that on my wedding day. Even when we try to be amicable in public settings he inevitably says something rude or hurtful. My concern is the backlash from not inviting him, since no one really knows what happened in our relationship. I am afraid of offending his parents by not inviting him.

I’m not sure what to do! What is the etiquette for this?!

-Guestlist Woes

A: Dear GW,

Don’t invite him. You’re still close with the parents, but you’re no longer close with him. That happens in a lot of relationships, regardless of sordid past. And inviting parents certainly doesn’t necessitate the inviting of their adult children. Inviting the parents you still consider close but the son you no longer do just makes sense. Chances are, no one will question it. And if they do, you can be honest. You’re not inviting him because you don’t have the best relationship. The rest is no one’s business, and there’s a chance no one would even think to ask.

If you would like to ask Team Practical a question please don’t be shy! You can email: askteampractical [at] apracticalwedding [dot] com. If you would prefer to not be named, anonymous questions are also accepted. Though it really makes our day when you come up with a clever sign-off!