Imperfict Weddings II

by Meg Keene, CEO & Editor-In-Chief

So, it seems that we all needed to hear that our weddings don’t need to strive for perfection! The post I wrote last week was written mostly to remind myself that the standard being set for weddings is insane and unrealistic, and I needed to chill out, and let the pieces fall where they may. Whew! Well, talk about a big response. My inbox was flooded with “Mmmhummm! Preach it!” emails, along with the “Oh my god, I needed to hear that” emails. And then, everywhere I looked the post kept popping up again. Which is all well and good. If the only thing anyone remembered from this little blog was me saying “If you still believe in perfection, you are too young to get married,” then I would be happy.

Since I started thinking of the delightful imperfection of both weddings and marriages, I’ve stumbled on some quotes on the subject that I loved. Lest we forget:

“Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing; a confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished.” – Goethe

“Nearly all marriages, even happy ones, are mistakes: in the sense that almost certainly (in a more perfect world, or even with a little more care in this very imperfect one) both partners might have found more suitable mates. But the real soulmate is the one you are actually married to.” – J.R.R. Tolkien
And finally, the quote that would make the most excellent wedding reading, from Ms. Peonies:

“Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in”
– Leonard Cohen

Pictures from Marie Labbancz (thanks Kathryn)

Meg Keene

Meg is the Founder and EIC of APW. She has written two best selling wedding books: A Practical Wedding and A Practical Wedding Planner. Meg has her BFA in Drama from NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts. She lives in Oakland, CA with her husband and two children. For more than you ever wanted to know about Meg, you can visit #NASTY

Staff Picks

[Read comment policy before commenting]

  • I like to remind myself that a perfect wedding does not lead to a perfect marriage. It’s the saying I”m famous for among my friends, along with, “You are always only 9 months from having a baby. So be safe.”

  • Oh, I do love that Tolkien sentiment. I totally believe that.

    Soulmates, shmoulmates – it’s about the one you choose to marry.

  • Love the Cohen quote!

  • k

    Thank you so much for this post! I read Part 1 before but after your recap, I re-read it again just to remind myself of this. I’ve got less than 11 months to plan ours and the stress is already kicking in. I totally agree that weddings can’t be perfect but this planning is just CRAZY. Not to mention overwhelming on top of so many others things going on in my life. So I just wanted to say thanks…this post and the other made me feel better all over again.

    BTW…there’s this one quote I found on a magnet on one of our little vacays that I always hold true to my heart (even before our engagement). Just wanted to share it along with your other ones…

    “As long as we’re together, everything will fall into place.”

    Thank you again! Love the blog. TGIF too.

  • hehhehe – I used that same wedding for a post I did a few weeks ago!!

    I never understand what the draw of “perfect” is. The fun and funny memories are in the “whoops!”

  • whoops, you mixed up the quote a bit…but I think Leonard is okay with imperfection :)

  • Don’t sweat the small stuff.