reclaiming wife

Posts Tagged ‘Indie Wedding Dress’

* Lori, Special Ed Teacher & Raj, Doctor *

The cake was pink. Hand to God, I didn’t notice until the next morning at brunch when I asked someone when the cake turned pink. “It was always pink. We thought that must have meant something to you guys.” So I guess there’s an argument for having lots of personal touches at your wedding: if something goes wrong, people might think it was intentional.

Our wedding day turned out to be the coldest day of the year in Pensacola. I wish I could tell you I didn’t notice that, but to be quite honest, my internal monologue for the first minute of our wedding was, “Don’t shiver, don’t shiver, this is on video.” The temperature in December had, for the most part, been in the 70s. Right around the time people started coming into town, it got cold and rainy, though the sun did come out on our wedding day. So except for the winter coats during dinner, you can’t tell from the photos that it was below freezing.

Our programs only got handed out because as guests were arriving, my sister-in-law Dawn asked me if there were any, then went and passed them out herself. We left the sparklers for our exit at home. Of 150 people on our guest list, fewer than fifty came; some of the no replies really stung. And it was a lonely several months leading up to the wedding, living in a new place far from all of my friends while Raj did training there, doing most of the wedding stuff on my own. Plenty of times, particularly in the last few weeks, I wondered whether a wedding was really worth all of the work and stress.

I am here to tell you that, for us, it absolutely was. Every bit of it. Because of the people who did come.

Hands down, the best decision we made was to rent a huge beach house. We wanted a laid-back wedding, and our top priority was to be able to spend as much time as possible with our guests, who are scattered around the country and beyond. The house ate up a third of our budget, but served as our venue for the rehearsal dinner, wedding reception, and post-wedding brunch, as well as housing our families and most of the wedding party. It was the turn-around for our wedding morning 5K and the site of an epic game of Scattergories with fifteen of our closest friends. It gave us the gift of time with our loved ones outside the official events and the fun of watching them get to know one another. Continue reading Wedding Graduate: Lori & Raj’s Rented Beach House Wedding

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

Samantha, Project Manager & Mark, Technical Art Director *

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

After we got engaged, I really didn’t know what to do about the wedding. I was all atwitter with happiness and joy and excitement that Mark and I were really going to do this whole “get married” thing. But as for specifics? The actual event? I didn’t know where to start. This feeling was further complicated by not fitting the traditional mold of the “blushing bride.” I’m not exactly a dress size that lets me go to bridal shops and enjoy myself. I’m also realistic and practical enough to know that trying to fit myself into that mold would just end in heartache, so I turned to the internet. Oh, internet, how wonderful you can be! I found APW and I found out that I was not alone. It made me feel better to know that the things I wanted to throw out of my wedding were absolutely okay to throw out. It made me feel better to know that I wasn’t alone in not wanting to do things the “usual” way. There were all these people out there who were having these amazing indie weddings, and I could be one of them. I could be cool about planning our wedding. We would only do things that felt right to us. We would not be held hostage by convention. We would be calm and Zen and we would have a wonderful, easy wedding. It would be perfect!

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

Of course, this is easier said than done. Me being me, I started to worry about things, so many things. I worried about the location. I worried about the food. I worried about flowers and cake and favors. I worried, actually worried, about Jordan almonds. I worried that no one would come. I worried that too many people would come. I worried no one would talk, that we would all just sit in awkward silence staring at each other and silently begging time to go faster so the horrible pain of my boring wedding would stop. I worried and I worried and I worried.

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

SF City Hall, Courthouse Wedding, Restaurant Reception

The trouble with trying to plan an easy wedding? They aren’t easy. Perfection is hard to plan out. All those beautiful pictures you see take work. Or money. Or both. A lot more work and money than the word “easy” would lead you to believe. Continue reading Wedding Graduates: Samantha & Mark’s City Hall Wedding And Restaurant Reception

* Lin, Product Manager & Pat, Optician * Photographer: TC Fitzgerald * Soundtrack for reading: “I Got You” by Wilco *

One sentence sum up of the wedding vibe: A happy day at the farm surrounded by awesome family, friends, great food, and lots and lots of dancing.

Continue reading Wordless Wedding: Lin & Pat’s DIT Massachusetts Farm Wedding

* Megan, Advertising Coordinator & Joe, Chef Of The Future * Photographer: Kateryn Silva (APW Sponsor) * Soundtrack for reading: “This Time Tomorrow” by The Kinks

One sentence sum up of the wedding vibe: A relaxed and easy gathering in the woods.


Continue reading Wordless Wedding: Megan & Joe’s Woodsy New Jersey Wedding

* Valentina, Assistant Curator and Art History Grad Student & Robert, Accountant * Photographer: Jonas Seaman (APW Sponsor) * Soundtrack for Reading: “All the Things you Are” by Serge Chaloff *

One sentence sum up of the wedding vibe: Romantic, spontaneous, quintessentially New York celebration of love.

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The Info—Photographer: Jonas Seaman (APW Sponsor) / Ceremony Venue: Central Park / Party Venue: Acme / Flowers: Sprout Home / Valentina’s Wedding Dress: Her mother’s vintage wedding dress from Geoffrey Beene, adjusted by Jeeves / Valentina’s Disco Dress: Pookie & Sebastian / Valentina’s Shoes: Prada / Robert’s Suit: Yves Saint Laurent / Robert’s Tie: Vintage Italian from the Vintage Thrift Shop / Cake: Momofuku Milk Bar / Invitations: Golden Rectangle Press / Violinists: Ginger Dolden and Pete Lanctot of Bantam Studios / Band: Lapis Luna

Other cool stuff we should know about: We wanted the whole day to be a reflection of us and the city we met and fell in love in. We created a celebration that would be fun yet easygoing, elegant yet casual, sophisticated yet sweet. No planner, nothing crazy. We wanted the ceremony to be very personal and all about us and the reception to be a big party for all of our friends and family. To that end, our ceremony was held in Central Park since we spend so much time there with our dog, Big, and because we both love nature. We wanted it to feel like we just walked into the park spur-of-the-moment and got married, so everyone was standing around us in a big semi-circle.

The reception was cocktail-style with lots of delicious hors d’oeuvres and drinks. Lapis Luna, an amazing jazz band, played our favorite songs and a great Tarantella for everyone to dance to! After lots of jazz, food, and cake, our friend busted out his DJ equipment and gave us the disco dance party we had always dreamed of. Valentina changed into a sequin dress and shoes, and Rob’s shirt and tie came flying off. It was the best day and night of our lives.

Favorite thing about the wedding: The city: all the boat rowers in the lake cheering and clapping for us, the tourists snapping photos and wishing us well, the joggers running by us with smiles and, of course, that crazy band that photobombed us!

This post includes Sponsors, who are a key part of supporting APW. For more information, see our Directory page for Jonas Seaman Photography.

* Laura, Administrator at a Higher Education Institution & Alexander, Finance *

One of the things I dislike most about the wedding industry is the way that it can create divides where there normally are none, pitting us against each other almost altogether unnecessarily. Elaborate weddings vs. simple weddings. Modern weddings vs. vintage weddings. And on and on. And the reality is, I don’t think most of us are trying to make a political statement with our weddings. Like Laura & Alexander, I think most of the time we’re just trying to do what feels right and most authentic to ourselves. And if you ask me, I think they nailed it.

—Maddie

Easy, plain, and simple are not the words most people start with when trying to plan a wedding, but from the moment Alex and I met I never doubted our love and wanted our wedding to reflect that carefree attitude we bring to our everyday life together.

It was not supposed to be easy to plan a wedding in the UK with all our family and friends living in Canada, South Africa, America, and Australia, so from the start of our planning we made a pact to choose the easiest option for everything. We wanted everyone to feel invited to our wedding and unfortunately had to accept that time, travel, and cost would prohibit many from coming on such short notice. Instead of worrying about renting hotels and block booking flights we accepted that whoever ended up coming was meant to be and would be a valuable part of our day. Looking back this was one of the best decisions as we were so touched and honoured to see all of our fifty-three guests and enjoyed spending the week of the wedding with them. I couldn’t imagine any other guest list than the one we ended up with.

Plain is not a theme you see a lot on the wedding blogs. Colours, themes, sparkles, and poofs are always encouraged. We didn’t have a huge budget for our wedding and since we were getting married in London, one of the loveliest cities in the world, we figured why obstruct it. My dress, shoes and blazer were all bought online at bargain prices and of course my husband, his brother, and father wore their family tartan and looked more handsome than ever. The bridesmaids were flying over from Canada, so they chose their own simple nude dresses off the high street. Bouquets and centrepieces were simple hydrangeas bought in bulk from the Covent Garden Flower Market and arranged the day before the wedding. Our reception was held at a local pub in a beautiful blue dining room with food taking centre stage.

Simple was hard. I was surprised how easy it was to start with a simple idea and get carried into complexity. Looking back though, on the day it was the simple moments that I valued most. The cake our friend made for us, the walk from the church to the pub, the Vicar’s smile as he cracked jokes during our ceremony, and the bottles of pretty-cheap champagne everyone enjoyed in the church garden after the ceremony. Even our simple tissue paper pom-poms, that bridesmaids helped make, created a beautiful atmosphere in the reception and became great props for the late night dance party. Continue reading Wedding Graduate: Laura & Alexander’s Simple London Wedding