Lexi, artist, and Katherine, artist
sum-up of the wedding vibe: Being transported through a technicoloured vortext and arriving in an underwater outer space crystal-powered kingdom.
Planned budget: $1000
Actual budget: $2000
Numbers of guests: 60
Where we allocated the most funds
Food and drink was where we ended up spending the most money! My wife Kat has a taurus moon astrologically. She ended up deciding to order $600 worth of catering only a couple of days before the wedding and so that was an unexpected and the most expensive part, but also a delicious relief.
Where we allocated the least funds
Venue, decorations and room design! This was my favorite part! Kat and I aesthetically love all things magical witchy cosmic and otherwordly! She’s a light design artist and I’m a creative producer so we used really beautiful elements that we already had, like hundreds of crystals, glittery walls, mirrors, material, fairy lights and a giant rainbow light installation! We used her studio space as our venue, and so we had complete artistic control.
What was totally worth it
The harp player. I’m a beginner student of the harp and obsessed with its deeply relaxing siren vibes. The harp player was much more expensive than I anticipated because last moment, a friend could not do it. So we were referred to an amazing harpist named Brandee. She was very confident and professional and was able to play for 2 hours with out any direction from us. We were so busy it was such a relief that we didn’t have to design a playlist or request lots of songs, she had a beautiful repertoire.
What was totally not worth it
I wish we had hired a few people to be in charge of the food and drink area. People that could clear away empty plates and set up the cake and restock the food platters and the alcohol. Only Kat and I knew where the extra food and drink was and it was hard to entertain guests and be present in the celebrations whilst also trying to stay on top of those behind the scenes duties.
A few things that helped us along the way
Friends! It is difficult for both Kat and I to ask for help! But it was really imperative that we had it! There are a few friends we could not have done it with out. Especially with helping us set up the space a day and a half before the wedding!
My best practical advice for my planning self
Things always take longer than you think they will. Also to factor in emotional stresses and energy levels when planning. Just because you have the time or the will doesn’t mean everything will go to plan! Remembering you are a person not a machine haha! You get tired and you will probably cry. Plan for your most unproductive stressed out self, not your superwoman best!
Favorite thing about the wedding:
That’s so hard!!! Everything was so beautiful. The harp playing! Or the cake!!!! It had marshmallow icing.
Anything else we should know
Our wedding was super DIY! We planned the wedding in only three weeks! I was in Australia for two of those three weeks while Kat was in NYC! It was madness!! We had a seemingly impossible time period and a very very small budget. But also we were able to have a magical wedding. I do wish we had a bit more time to plan it. I am a virgo and am overly ambitious with scheduling! I would recommend giving yourself as much time as you possibly can, more than you think you will need…
We wanted our wedding to fit with our lifestyles, politics, and ethics. We are both the type of people that didn’t want to have a huge commercialized wedding and we wanted it to be really personalized and reflective of us. Therefore, our wedding was a collaboration. I feel really grateful that we are both from queer and art communities. We were able to get the help of our friend who’s a fashion designer for example. We cut out and pinned 60 silk pillow cases and our friend sewed them all in 2 hours a few days before our wedding!
Our celebrants were beyond words. Our friends who are a couple, one a celebrant and one a soundscape artist led the ceremony for us. They really performed an art piece and a ritual in one. The sound was unrehearsed and there was percussion, symbols, even some dancing it was really surreal and more than we had hoped or imagined.
I feel really lucky that we had such special expressive and talented friends to collaborate with.