FAQ
Let's Get Started:
Who are you?
I'm Meg. I live in San Francisco. I'm 31. I have my degree in, I swear to god, postmodern experimental theatre from NYU. This means I'm trained in writing composition and creative work, which I'm now using as a writer and a blogger. Life is funny like that. I worked in professional theatre in New York running my own company, producing shows, doing fundraising for Broadway and off-Broadway theaters, and throwing very large galas. I also worked in the research department of a large investment bank, which is a long story. My inner self is a four-year-old girl, and as a result I am very talkative, pretty funny, and very bossy. I also constantly wish I was wearing a purple fairy tutu, rain boots, and a stripy sweater. You can read more of my bio here.
Questions About The Site:
How did APW start?
It started when I was wedding planning, crying, and convinced the whole wedding world was bat-sh*t crazy. You can read about that incident here, and you can read my first posts here.
Who is "Team Practical"?
Back when I had about a hundred readers, I used to think of them in my head as Team Practical. Then, when I had about two hundred readers, I started calling them Team Practical out loud, mostly as a joke. Now, everyone refers to the readership of APW as Team Practical, but seriously. I kind of like it. So if you're wondering if you're on the team, you probably are.
I'm confused by some terms on this site. Can you help me out?
Sure! We try to stay away from acronyms on the site because, as Ariel at the Offbeat Empire has pointed out, they tend to be exclusionary. But, WIC stands for Wedding Industrial Complex (you can read my tongue-in-cheek thoughts about that here). Sometimes readers ironically refer to the BIC, which is the Blogging Industrial Complex... which, I suppose APW is technically a part of. Technically. Readers also talk about Shame Blasting, which is the idea that we can get rid of shame by sharing our experiences. You can read the original Shame Blasting post here.
What if I'm single/not engaged/already married/or divorced? Is this site still for me?
Absolutely. Sometimes I say that APW is a life site pretending to be a wedding and marriage site. Lisa of Privilege wrote a lovely post about how APW provides a gathering point around the virtual fire for all kinds of women, and that really is our goal (cloaked in wedding-y goodness).
I have a question and I need advice. Who should I contact?
I can't handle advice questions on my own anymore (you should see my inbox). But! You can submit a question to Alyssa to be considered for inclusion in our weekly Ask Team Practical advice post.
I want to get in touch with other readers from this site. How can I do that?
If you want to meet APW readers in real life, we organize APW Book Clubs all over the world every few months. Readers meet up on the same day all over the world, discuss a book, and drink. You can also chat with readers on Twitter, as well as on the APW Facebook Page. Different cities have their own APW Facebook Groups where they arrange regular meet ups, including San Francisco, DC, Chicago, and New York.
How do I get a cool icon with a picture of my face in the comments?
Sign up with Gravatar. Thousands of sites on the web use the same program. It's easy to sign up and then BAM, picture.
I want to submit a post. How do I do that?
You can submit a post right over here! Due to the sheer volume of submissions and our relatively tiny staff, we can't respond to each and every post. But, if we see something that's a good fit for the site, we'll get in touch, though it usually takes us a few weeks or months to get a post published. So, like all creative endeavors, you should write us a post because you really want to think through the topic, not because you're trying to impress us or yourself (we already think you're smart and adorable).
I sent you an email. What happened with that?
One of two things happened. Either I read it and I wrote you a really chatty email back, because I figure we're friends already, or I read it and loved it and didn't have time to write a long chatty email back, and I'm still feeling guilty about it.
Can I advertise on APW?
If you think you're a good fit for the APW community, get in touch!
Do you know there are typos on your site?
Yes. I'm dyslexic. It's funny how so many of us dyslexic types are creative and like to write (shakes fist at sky). I employ a copy editor and take full credit for any errors. That said, you can submit your own edits with the "Editz" button at the end of every post.
Business Info:
Is this your full time job?
Yes, it is! I waited a very long time to go full time on blogging because with my husband in law school and the economy in free-fall, I needed to be able to support a family of two on my own. But in January 2011, I left my full time job to run APW and to write a book, which was released in January of 2012. These days, I work forty plus hours a week bringing you content and keeping the business side of APW running smoothly. I love it.
Where can I get A Practical Wedding, the book?
You can get it lots of places (including probably your local bookstore), but the simplest place might be Amazon.
I want to work for myself. What's your best advice?
I've talked about what I've learned about self-employment on the site, but my short answer is: It's a lot of work, and it takes a long time. Don't rush things. If working for yourself is one of life's great joys, then working for yourself and being scary broke is one of life's great terrors. I'd been working at building a business for three years before I went full time, and I was spending every non-working waking hour on the project by the time I quit. (Literally, I'm afraid.) Also, make sure you get help.
So speaking of help. Who do you work with?
My web design, programming, and hosting is all done by Super Runaway. They are a married team (Liz and Jeff), and they focus on web design for independent businesses. They are talented and hard working and never miss a deadline. I could not recommend them more highly. My accounting is managed by the team at CFO Rick. They focus exclusively on small businesses. They make sure I have yearly budgets that make sense, pay my taxes properly, and plan for retirement. They are located in San Francisco, but work remotely as well. They make my life better. I also have a crazy-fabulous staff of freelancers, and you can read about them here.
I want to start a blog. What advice do you have for me?
* Blog consistently. I wrote five posts a week from the moment I started the blog. You don't have to blog that often, but make sure your content comes at regular intervals so people know when to expect it. * Blogging is not about money even when you're making money. Chances are, you're not going to make a full time business out of blogging for a long time… if ever. Write because you're passionate about what you're writing about and you love the work. * Create original content. Maybe that's writing, maybe that's photography. But make it original and yours. After you've done this for awhile, you might end up taking guest posts, like we do on APW. But don't just re-post other people's work. * Start a blog if you feel like you have a perspective that's not being heard. If you're doing exactly what someone else is already doing, what's the point? * Be generous with your community. * Be kind. *
I want to write a book. What advice do you have?
I've written about the process of writing the APW book on the site, but here is my best advice:
* Have a platform. You can't get in the door of publishing these days unless they think you can sell about 10,000 books on your own. * Have a fabulous sellable idea, and then write a killer proposal (mine took me about six months). * Get an agent. Your agent will take care of pitching the book, getting you a good deal and watching your back. * The best way to get an agent is to have someone in your field write you an email introduction. * If you can land with a good publishing team, thanks to your agent, getting a book into the world can be a lovely experience. * Don't expect to get rich. * Write a book because you really want to write a book. That's the only way it's ever going to be worth it. * Getting over the fear of writing a book is way harder than the actual act of writing a book. (Pulitzer winning fiction excluded. That seems very hard.) *
General Questions:
I'm visiting San Francisco on my honeymoon. Where should I stay?
I've lived in San Francisco since 2007, and I still feel like a bit of a newbie here after spending a decade in New York. But, all my best tips were summed up by Maggie Mason of Mighty Girl in her 10 Ways to See San Francisco Like a Local. My only additional advice? Don't stay in Union Square (it's like staying in a mall); the Mission is the interesting hipster neighborhood; explore North Beach/ Nob Hill because it's classic San Francisco; and if you're doing wine country, hit Russian River, not Napa. Also, expect heavy fog in July and August. And have fun!
About Meg:
Are you married already, or are you planning your wedding?
I am, thank the stars, already married. We got hitched in August 2009, and you can read all about it. I learned more about myself during wedding planning than I ever want to learn ever again. And it turns out we had the world's most perfect wedding... perfect for us, that is, by which I mean it was deeply imperfect but shockingly joyful.
Who did you get hitched to?
David. I married real-life David, but character David (as he calls it) appears on this site. The real David is brillianter than me and very funny. He used to represent playwrights, but then he started representing criminals. He says he likes the criminals better. I can't let him write guest posts very often because his jokes are so over the line you can't see the line anymore. Plus, he says he thinks I have things covered.
How did you meet?
Our first known meeting was in math class early in High School. However, it's possible we could have met as early as pre-school, but thus far we have no photographic proof.
Does that mean you have a great love story?
Hell no. We didn't get along for years and years. Then we became friends in New York City, founded a theatre company together, I got seriously ill, and then we decided to get married. I mean, we decided to date, and then got married five years later.
Why are you still writing about weddings if you are married?
I have a lifelong obsession with trying to align my desire for overtly traditional social structures (marriage, kids) with my knowledge that if I buy into traditional structures at face value, I will slowly die inside. They say good bloggers are obsessive, and I obsess about weddings and marriage (and parenting, but I don't write about that yet). Also, my wedding planning experience was transformative, so I enjoy talking to other people going through it. That, and I like the dresses and flowers and things.
Do you think you're fancy?
Not really. But I do have silver shoes.