Two days before our wedding, as my mom’s living room filled with half-finished (okay, really they were half-started) wedding projects, and the amount of time we had to finish said projects dwindled, Michael and I did one of the best things we could do for our wedding: we scrapped most of them. Those table runners we were going to make turquoise and gold? Yeah, no. The votives we were going to spray paint orange? Whoops. It was hard letting go of my beloved projects at first (they were going to look so good). But once the decision was made? Goodbye and good riddance (with maybe just a few tears. DIY grief is real).
Earlier this week, I was talking with a friend about the joy of canceling plans. While I try not to bail on friends and loved ones on the regular, there is the rare occasion where I’m just stretched too thin, too close to the brink, and I have to make the call (cough, send the text) that goes, “I really wanted to do this, but can we reschedule?” It’s uncomfortable, and for a brief moment I feel like the world’s most inconsiderate person. But then comes the wash of relief, as I realize how much more time I have left to do the eight hundred things I probably should have finished already.
Scrapping wedding projects is a little like that, except you get to multiply your level of relief by however many guests you have, or how many tables need decorating. And sure crossing things off your list because you abandoned them might not grant the same level of accomplishment as crossing things off your list because you actually finished them. But at the end of the day? You’ve got exactly the same number of things left to do. And the former takes considerably less time than the latter.
But for all the relief that comes with hacking your to-do list, it’s a little sad that no will ever know about that epic, awesome, totally original idea you had. And also, nobody celebrates with you when you scrap a project that was never going to happen (rude). But dammit, self-preservation warrants celebration (especially when it comes to weddings), and you should be able to celebrate the things you didn’t do just as hard as you celebrate the things you did do.
So while everyone else is asking you how much you’ve gotten done for the wedding, today’s open thread is all about what you haven’t you done (and have no plans to do). The killer project that got left in the dust when you realized it would require not sleeping for your whole engagement. The thing it turned out was easier to just buy. Today let’s toast to downsizing and pat ourselves on our backs for being smart enough to realize when it’s just not going to happen. (Hopefully further out than two days before your wedding. Don’t be like me.) And while we’re celebrating, I won’t stop you from telling each other how awesome that project would have been, still is, even if it isn’t happening. Because it totally would have been. If only there was enough time…
What was that killer idea that was never meant to be? What is the proverbial “white whale” of wedding planning goals?
