*Rachel, Operations Analyst & Jonathan, Chef*
Today’s wedding graduate post is just perfect. Not much more to say. Rachel is writing a thank you note to her partner, something we probably all should do after surviving wedding planning. She says it all, so I don’t have to.
Dear Jon,
We did it. We got married. We stood in front of one hundred people, said our vows without screwing up, and you successfully crushed the lightbulb glass. My homemade chuppah didn’t collapse, we didn’t cry (although it would have been ok if we had), and we danced down the aisle to Elvis.
One could argue that we cemented our new, baby family on that glorious day, but I think we both know that we did that long ago, probably somewhere along the way. Or perhaps, when I sabotaged your proposal and you still proposed later that night, despite being mad that I ruined it. Oops.
As you know I am huge proponent of a heartfelt thank you note, and I think I owe you one more than anyone.
Thank you. Thank you for being you, for holding me when I needed it, for listening to me rant on and on and on about God knows what wedding related topic. For being patient when you needed to be and for kicking me in the butt when I needed it. For successfully wading through all the drama together that happened only three months before we got married. I probably would have drowned without you.
Seeing you stand beside me and fight for the same principles that I stood for was one of the best and heartwarming moments (even in the midst of drama). Knowing that we are in this together and we will come out of this together made it that much easier to get through such a tough time.
Thank you for being there when I realized one wintery night that wedding colors don’t matter; that traditions are ok to be embraced, tossed, or reinvented. Thank you for Googling “wedding traditions around colors” (no joke ladies and gentlemen…not much comes up, by the way), and letting me race around the house lamenting about why the heck should we have to choose such silly things, what do colors have to do with getting married anyway? Why must we drink wine at the ceremony? Why can’t I drink coconut rum instead?
I am forever grateful that we decided to toss out the tradition of separating the night before the wedding and instead, just chilled out at our house and spent the next morning before the wedding like it was any other day of the week. It was the best idea ever and so calming for what we knew the day would inevitably bring.
Thank you for your patience. I still believe that a relationship requires patience, understanding, love, and laughter. And in the midst of wedding planning you need to bring in reinforcements of each for they are all tested. You definitely found extra bushels of patience somewhere (Target perhaps? Did you use a coupon?).
I know that eventually, we ran out of it and I am sorry for things I said or the way I acted during the weeks before our wedding (like a crazy control-freak-induced chicken). It is so easy to feel alone during that time when the to-do list starts growing out of control; even the best planners/type As can lose it (me). I felt like I was alone on an island with my giant to-do list because I am horrible at delegating and love DIY as therapy.
I wish I had reached out more to you; realized that it’s okay to relinquish control at times; I probably wouldn’t have washed up on my own island, pouting for days.
Thank you for testing out each possible song with me in our living room. Dancing around to Elvis, the Beatles, Sinatra, Prince, and Michael Jackson was a blast. Yes we fought about each and every song for pre-ceremony and cocktail hour and while neither of us heard any of the songs when they were played, I still love listening to the playlist, even months afterwards.
Most of all, thanks for laughing with me (and sometimes at me). We needed it and it made the planning process so much more fun. In the end, we did what we set out to do: we got married because we wanted to.
It didn’t matter if anyone showed up, saw all of our hard work, gorgeous decor, or tasted our jars of homemade jam. We just wanted to be together, be married, and then take a nap. Because naps are good. Especially with you.
Love,
Rachel
The Info—Photography: Gabriel Ryan /Venue: Richard Nixon Presidential Library / Planner: Grand Engagements /Florist: Honey and Poppies / Rachel’s Dress: From Mariposa Bridal / Favors: Jars of jam, made by us!
