Normcore, if we go by New York Mag’s definition, “isn’t about rebelling against or giving into the status quo; it’s about letting go of the need to look distinctive.“
Maybe normcore is new to fashion, but as far as the wedding industry is concerned, normcore is the name of the game. Sure, the industry likes to throw around buzzwords like “unique” and “personal,” but for the most part, there is a limited range of what’s considered acceptable at weddings, especially when it comes to attire, and a lot of fear-based reinforcement involved in maintaining the standard (which anyone who has ever been threatened with “not looking like a bride” will understand). This goes for tomboys who would rather wear pants but get talked into cupcake dresses. And it goes for the glamour girls who wear sequins on the regular but end up “toning it down” in simple white frocks. It’s especially hard to break away from the pull of wedding normcore when it’s not just the wedding industry promoting bridal ideals. So you want to wear a romper to your wedding? Too bad anything other than a wedding dress would break your mom’s heart.
If you’re not someone who normally cares about what they wear, all of this probably sounds like the definition of no big deal. But when I’m feeling powerless, the ability to choose what I put on my back each day is what gives me just enough sense of autonomy to get through the day and deal with the stuff that’s actually making me feel powerless. Which means that when the wedding was bearing down on me, and it felt like everyone’s needs but my own were being voiced, my attire became my safe space. And one of the things I was willing to fight for. (It’s my body y’all. Let me wear the gaudy, shiny things!)
It’s a balance, though. I know how hard it is to fight the homogeneity of the wedding industry. It’s exhausting. And when you’re trying to convince your family that getting married on the beach instead of in a church isn’t a sign of end-times, well, clothing might not be a hill you’re willing to die on.
So if you’ve been feeling lately like the wedding planning process has scrubbed you clean of the stuff that makes you, well, you, then consider this roundup permission to put a little of yourself back in. The best part? You can do the normcore thing for family photos and the ceremony when everyone has their eyes on you, then slink off and throw on a ridiculous coverup and some crazy jewelry while everyone’s sipping on signature cocktails. By the time you get back, they’ll be boozy enough they won’t care.
Bags 1. Kzeniya Wild Chain Clutch, from Urban Outfitters ($149) 2. Women’s Glitter Knuckle Skulls Hard Case, from Amazon ($39.98) 3. Estrella in Gold, from Le Chic ($129) 4. Betsey Johnson Bright Lights Clutch, from Lord and Taylor ($78) 5. Alexa Mohawk-Stud Minaudiere, from BCBGMAXAZRIA ($103.60)
Coverups 1. DKNYC Plus Open Front Blazer, from Lord and Taylor ($139.50) 2. Plus Size Faux Fur Vest, from Simply Be ($69) 3. Fairy Floss Faux Fur Coat, from Nasty Gal ($88) 4. Champagne Taste Cape Blazer in Black, from Nasty Gal ($68)
Jewelry 1. Maria Black D’arling Gold Plated Earring, from Net-A-Porter ($150) 2. Nope Sweet Nothing Necklace Brass, from In God We Trust ($40) 3. Silver Secret Flask Bangle by Cynthia Rowley, from Bona Drag ($225) 4. White Embellished Draped Chain Shoulderpads, from River Island ($70) 5. Gold Tone Jewelled Body Harness, from River Island ($80) 6. Leather and Chain Wrap Watch by Sara Designs, from Shop Bop ($198) 7. Grier Brass Earrings, from In God We Trust ($110)
Bonus! Feeling like being a little mischievous, but not necessarily edgy for your wedding? Perhaps a new flask is just the ticket.