What Problems Are People Inventing For Your Wedding?

Because you didn't have any real problems of your own...

Have you noticed the thing that happens during wedding planning, where suddenly all real-world logic starts to fail people? You might see it manifest in things like:

  • Your dad insisting that a wedding isn’t real unless there’s a wedding cake.
  • Your mom freaking out that people won’t understand how to get from the hotel to the venue without written instructions. (I mean, GPS is here to stay.)
  • Your sister telling you that you won’t look “bridal” in your non-traditional wedding dress.
  • Your mother-in-law telling you people will leave your rehearsal dinner if you just have beer and not white wine.

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It’s like weddings make us forget that we are all adults who successfully move through the world on a daily basis.

Case in point: a friend is throwing a bridal shower for her sister this month. She’s booked a private room at a local bar-and-restaurant that also features an arcade, candlepin bowling, and a bocce court. And a mutual friend confided in me that she’s really worried the guests may show up not knowing if they are expected to bowl or bocce. And when I say really worried, I mean really worried. Like this potential confusion could take down the whole event. And while I’m pretty sure that when you show up at a party with bowling, bocce, and an arcade, you generally get a drink and dive in, I’m also not currently making up problems for other people’s weddings.

With four friends who got married last year, this isn’t the first story of this nature I’ve heard. Folks invent imaginary problems for your wedding all the time. (Which is super convenient, because I’m sure you don’t have any real problems to deal with.) So here’s my question: What plane of reality are your people existing on these days? What problems are they making up for you, big or small?

what’s the weirdest thing someone has said to you about your wedding? What inane problems have been invented that you didn’t think could possibly exist?

A version of this post ORIGINALLY RAN ON APW IN July 2017.

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