Oprah Gave Us the Best Wedding Planning Philosophy

You can't go wrong with your favorite things

Massiel, Museum factotum & Nicholas, Animal helper

One sentence sum-up of the wedding vibe: The wedding of two best friends (or the collision of Westeros and Downton)

Soundtrack for reading: “Pienso En Ti” by Shakira

Other cool stuff we should know about

We had no idea what kind of wedding we wanted. We’re both highly prone to social hangovers and we generally avoid being the center of attention at all costs (which might seem weird given the fact that I wore sequins and feathers), so it was hard to plan a day where essentially it was an all-eyes-on-us type of deal. After several emotional meltdowns, we jointly reached a state of mind that grew out of an Oprah-esque conviction to basically just throw caution to the wind and let all our favorite things dictate the evening. Our reception venue is literally my favorite building in all of Los Angeles and so lovely, we didn’t even try to upstage it with decor. We got a keg of our favorite beer, catering from our favorite restaurant, wine from Nick’s cousin’s Napa vineyard, six cakes instead of the traditional multi-tiered version, dark and dreamy flowers, and a teeny tiny wedding party that was just my sister and his cousin. Oh, and that dress. I found it on a late night Pinterest binge and never looked back. I tried it on in a bathroom in Boston with only my mom and my sister around and decided then and there that I was going to glitter like a snowflake and wear a fabulous cape like I’m the King of the North.

We just need to shout out to our amazing vendors who never missed a beat, even when unexpected hurdles were thrown at them. So much love for our photographers, who gracefully handled a situation with one of my difficult aunts after she refused to move out of the way when they were shooting our ceremony; for our dear friend, floral genius, and all-around bad ass, Opal, who rolled with the punches after all the flowers we had picked during our test run were suddenly out of stock and gave us stunning beauties that were beyond our expectations; for our reception venue staff who saved our cakes from melting by stowing them in their office lunchroom refrigerators; for our coordinator, Allie, who was just stellar at everything, truly invaluable, and the calm touchstone we needed that day reassuring us that everything would turn out alright… and sneaking us beer so that we could share a private little kiss and toast between the two of us just after our ceremony; and for the APW community at large—y’all are miraculous, eye-opening wonders. As soon as we realized that we didn’t need to compare our wedding to anyone else’s, and that a tiny budget was not the kiss of death, we reached the calm needed to move things along and put our own distinct stamp on things in a way that might not mean anything to anyone else, but just meant the world to the two of us.

I’m part of a very small minority amongst my married friends who will openly admit that my wedding day was not the best day of my life. What I am just over the moon about is the man at my side—my forever boy. When you can end the night in bed with your best friend, pants off, eating cake at midnight, that’s all that will ever really matter.

Favorite thing about the wedding

There was a moment after we had exchanged vows when our priest came down from the altar for communion and the two of us were left sitting alone together. The too-wonderful Trio Ellas was playing “O Holy Night” (by special request) and Nick and I were just holding hands, and me smiling so hard my cheeks hurt. He was all mine in that little instance—no stress, no one pulling us in different directions, nothing but each other. It was awesome.


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