Making And Maintaining Friendships

Earlier today I wrote about how the internet can be a tool for making new friends, if we use it wisely. And while it did wonders for me, I have to admit that sometimes one thing still holds me back: I’m a pretty terrible communicator. I ignore text messages, I can’t stand talking on the phone, and I am more likely to continue my eleventh rewatch of Buffy the Vampire Slayer than look for a buddy to hang out with on any given evening. When I was younger I chalked it up to being a wallflower, and I decided that if my social butterfly friends wanted to hang out, certainly they would know to call me…right? (Hint: it might have helped if I told them that.) It took me longer than I care to admit to realize that my friends weren’t calling because I never called them either, not because they didn’t want to hang out with me. And while I am still terrible at picking up the phone (seriously y’all talking on the phone is the worst), I’m much better now at making that first move, or reaching out to keep in touch with friends.

So this open thread is for you, social butterflies and wallflowers alike. When it comes to making new friends or maintaining friendships, what are your tried and true methods? How do you make the first move? What do you like to do with your friends? How do you keep in touch? No one system is going to make our friendships effortless, but let’s help each other make the journey a little easier.

Personally, I’m a fan of the open text invite to hang out, or silly mass email chains. And as previously mentioned, I love a good drunk brunch. APW, what are your tips? (And problems, and solutions.) It’s nearing the end of friendship month. Let’s get down to business.

Photo from Lucy’s wedding by Asterisk Photo

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