Are You Having Wedding Nightmares?

Our subconscious is in overdrive

Last week, I was introduced to the wedding nightmare. Obviously, as a person who works in the wedding industry, this isn’t the first time I’ve dreamt about weddings. But I think this may be the first time I’ve had an unpleasant dream about my own wedding. It was such an intense dream that I brought it up at work that morning, and Meg and Keriann nodded. “Ah, the wedding nightmare.” Meg could still recount her own in detail (it involved Obama and a seating chart).

Apparently the wedding nightmare is a normal part of wedding planning…. even when you’re not living in a nightmare. But since we’re now living in some kind of walking night terror, things are apparently a little leveled up. My partner Trisha and I got engaged in June, and frankly just haven’t done any planning yet because the world is so unstable. The world in my dream, however, was even more unstable and hectic.

In the dream, our wedding was spread out over a few days. For who knows what reason, I had almost zero hand in the planning of the wedding (torture for a trained wedding planner with control issues). In fact, at the end of the dream, I was able to see the shared Google Drive folders of Trisha and a ton of other folks who apparently planned an entire dream nightmare wedding on my behalf.

Here’s just a few of the weird as hell things that happened during this dream…. The wedding occurred over the span of days… like, ceremony on a Friday afternoon, brunch and then a reception on Saturday, and another barbecue or something on Sunday. The florist was a girl I went to High School with but don’t even speak to anymore who is absolutely not a florist in real life. The cake was like something out of Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland—it was easily 7 feet tall and tilted in a way that I found my dream self trying to hold it up for what felt like hours. The venue we were at for some portion of it was the side yard (like, not even the backyard) of a friend’s parents home. Another portion happened at this venue on a hill, somewhere I’d never been, and as we were arriving so were literally thousands of strangers who apparently had bought tickets to our wedding (ugh)—picture endless amounts of people walking up the hill. And most horrifically… during the ceremony, I found myself out of body sort of watching it go down, and then what should be me and Trisha (as the brides) became… other people. At one point I was watching myself as a very unstable Britney Spears getting married to Trisha.

When I recount this, it all makes sense. I mean what is wedding planning right now if not spending hours holding up a 7 foot tall collapsing Tim Burton wedding cake? Which brings me to you. While we’ve talked about wedding nightmares before, we haven’t talked about them in 2020. So lay it on us: who’s having wedding nightmares? Who’s living a wedding nightmare? Let’s share gory details.

Please tell me you’ve had wild wedding dreams? Or weird pandemic dreams? Or both? I want to hear about them.

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