Steal These: Wedding Website Wording Examples


For all those tricky situations you’ve been avoiding

by Maddie Eisenhart, Chief Revenue Officer

AdvertisementAPW + Squarespace logoSample Squarespace wedding website for Javan and Rebekah on computer monitor

Putting together your wedding website should be easy. And for the most part it is. Thanks to our longtime partner Squarespace and their modern, designer-created wedding website templates, you can build a beautiful wedding website in less time than it’ll take you to binge watch the second season of Stranger Things (NO SPOILERS). But what about when it comes time to figure out what you want to say with said website? Our rule with wedding websites is that they should inform your guests of all the relevant details they’ll need in order to make smart decisions about your wedding. Beyond that? They’re adults, and you can’t tell people how to live their lives.

But sometimes with weddings there’s a tricky middle ground. Like when you need to let someone know that they don’t get a plus one. Or that you really, really, no REALLY don’t want any gifts. And that’s when a website is your best friend. Because here’s the thing: no one actually wants to have those touchy conversations with their wedding guests. But that doesn’t mean you can avoid telling your guests the information altogether. (Seriously, do not wait until the last minute to let your friends know that they can’t bring their six-month-old to your cross-country wedding.) And your wedding website is the perfect neutral territory to let your guests know the important info, without having to see their facial expressions when you do.

If you’re just getting started putting together your wedding website, Squarespace has you covered on making it look 💯. Plus, in addition to their stylish, modern templates, they’ve got all the bonus perks like a custom URL with your annual account, gallery pages to show off your beautiful faces, a super easily integrated registry experience, and really good customer service if you ever get stuck. And today we’re topping all that off with words you can steal. (And more specifically, words for those difficult-to-convey messages.) So here are five wedding website scripts you can copy and paste into your website to get your messages across without offending your family.

Now you have no excuses not to hit publish on that website you started two months ago.

Computer monitor showing wedding website with couple holding hands and words "our story" overlaid.

1. WHEN YOU just want cash gifts

I get it. You’ve been together half a decade, and you definitely don’t need a second toaster oven. So you’re trying to find a nice way to tell your guests that cash would be preferred. Well, my first bit of advice is this: your guests will get you gifts, whether you like it or not. (I’m sorry, I wish I could change this reality.) So if you choose to opt out of a registry, just go into it knowing that a handful of people are going to take that as a cue to get you whatever the hell they want, and your lovely cousin is definitely going to gift you a giant oven-safe seashell bowl. (I know, because a friend just got this exact dish.) So consider yourself warned. But there’s a way to wordsmith your way into having your cake and eating it too. Here’s how:

Don’t: No gifts please is just an invitation for your relatives to defy you and then be mad at you for it. Instead, provide your guests with some alternative options: set up a donation for a charity or cause you love, or set up a small registry with experiences versus physical items. Your guests won’t be left in the dark, and you’ll feel comfortable receiving what they generously want to give you. Though I can’t promise you won’t still get a giant seashell bowl. But at least this way you won’t get… two of them.

DO: We are so happy that you’ll be able to join us for our wedding. As many of you know, we live in a small New York City apartment (with only one closet), and it is already filled with all the things we could ever need to make it a home. While the presence of your company is the only gift we could ever ask for, an alternative registry has been set up here for those who have expressed an interest in offering a gift to mark the occasion.

Pro-tip: Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all. Squarespace makes it easy to integrate a registry page into your wedding website, with the option to include a customized cash registry, if you want. So simply set up a small registry (emphasis on small), link to it from your registry page, and once the physical items run out, most of your loved ones will take the hint and give you what you really want: cash. Or nothing. (Or a little of each.)

Computer monitor with wedding website showing male and female couple with heads together and words "we're getting married".

2. when you’re not inviting kids

We get this question a lot (and recently talked more about it here). And it’s always a touchy subject. But if you’re choosing to have a kid-free wedding, there’s a valid reason, and an aversion to children probably isn’t it. So the key is letting your guests know that. You’ll want to start with your invitations (make sure you list out the names of the invited guests, and include on the RSVP card the number of people invited per family). But then let your website do the talking. Here’s how to avoid (most of) the drama:

Don’t: No kids allowed. For reasons stated above.

Do: Per the guest limit at our venue, we will we not be able to have children attend. However, if you are traveling with you children to our wedding, we have coordinated with our hotel and a licensed local nanny service to provide childcare during the event. Please indicate on your RSVP card if you will be needing childcare. Also, we joyously welcome your children to our post-wedding brunch the following morning. Don’t hesitate to let us know how we further help!

Pro-tip: Providing childcare is not necessary, but it will increase your chances of “yes” replies on your RSVPs if you have out of town folks traveling with kids.

Computer monitor showing Squarespace wedding website with gay couple with their heads together. Words "he said yes" overlaid.

3.When you don’t trust your guests to dress themselves

When it comes to what you’d like your guests to wear, you don’t actually have a ton of control. People are going to wear what they are going to wear, and you don’t want to get into the murky waters of undermining someone’s gender expression, or religious beliefs, or anything else that might sour their experience at your wedding. But you can make gentle suggestions. In instances when it’s regarding traditional or cultural dress, make your guests feel like insiders and offer resources on how to find the appropriate garments.

DON’T: Our wedding colors are blush and bashful, so we’re asking all guests to wear something in one of those shades. Also, since our wedding is outside, don’t wear heels or dressy shoes. And we don’t want anyone dressing too formal, so leave your suits at home.

DO: We’re getting married on a working farm, so the ground will be soft and maybe a little muddy. Formal attire is not required! Feel free to dress in whatever makes you comfortable. For example, a dress shirt and khakis, or a spring skirt and sweater would be lovely. The night does tend to get a bit cold, so you might want to bring something to throw on when the sun goes down!

Pro-tip: It doesn’t all have to be business. You can have fun with your wedding website too. Set up a Q&A page (with Squarespace you can add as many custom pages as you want), then have fun answering all the logistical questions your loved ones might have. My friend Kristina recently got married, and under attire on her wedding website, she had two quotes: one from her mom that said, “You look good, you feel good!” and one from her brother that said, “Step it up!” It made everyone laugh and got the point across.

Computer monitor showing wedding website with couple jumping and doing a handstand with words "going down for real" overlaid.

4.When it’s a cash bar

The worst thing you can say about a cash bar is nothing at all. Because some people (um, me? Who had a cash bar at her own wedding?) tend to forget that money exists at weddings, and will forgo important things like cash and credit cards for the sake of a cute little clutch that matches her dress. So no, we’re totally not mad that you have a cash bar (anyone mad about a cash bar can be shown the door). But we’re real mad if you forget to tell us to bring MONEY. Because weddings are for drinking, amiright? So stick to the facts, and don’t over-explain yourself.

Don’t: We’re really sorry, but we’re having a cash bar. We wish we had enough money to cover all your drinks, but we just don’t, and we know our friends want to drink. Anyway please don’t be mad, but, BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH FOREVER.

Do: We so look forward to dancing the night away with you! Please note we will be offering a full selection of cocktails, beer, and wine until 10 p.m., at which point the bar will turn over into a cash bar.

Or: We so look forward to dancing the night away with you! Please note we will be offering a cash bar with a full selection of cocktails, beer, and wine all evening long.

Pro-Tip: Squarespace offers a custom domain with every yearly purchase, so take advantage of it and make your wedding website URL something easy to remember. That way your procrastinator friends can pull it up on their phones an hour before the wedding (bonus: Squarespace wedding websites are also mobile friendly) and get all the relevant information they need. This significantly decreases the chances that your college buddy will end up begging your uncle for money during the cash bar reception.

Computer monitor showing a Squarespace wedding website with the rules page.

5.When it’s an unplugged ceremony

We’ve all seen that one guest with a camera on a monopod sticking out in the aisle during the middle of a wedding ceremony. It’s the worst. Which is why we at APW are firm supporters of the unplugged ceremony, if that’s something you want. But unplugged ceremonies are a new concept, which means your older guests (and most of your younger ones, too) aren’t even going to know what one is. If an unplugged ceremony is important to you, I recommend having your officiant offer a polite reminder at the beginning of the ceremony asking folks to turn off their devices, since so many of us are programmed to just whip that phone out and start recording. But it doesn’t hurt to give a heads up with an informational blurb on your wedding website, setting expectations in advance, so Uncle Bob can leave his monopod at home.

Don’t: Demand everyone’s phones as folks come into the ceremony. Unless you’re Beyoncé, then you do what you want.

DO: We will be having an unplugged ceremony at our wedding. While we fully encourage everyone to bring their phones, cameras, and super8 recorders to document the day (plus your awesome outfit and fabulous dance moves), we politely request that all devices be turned off during the ceremony. Once we receive the professional images from our photographer after the wedding, we will be happy to send them to you!

Squarespace logo

Got helpful website Wording examples to share? Leave them in the comments!

This post was sponsored by Squarespace. Squarespace makes beautiful wedding websites happen in a matter of minutes, thanks to their user-friendly software and modern, minimal template designs. Every yearly Squarespace purchase also comes with a custom URL, and of course, their award winning customer service (just in case you get stuck). Click here to start a free 14-day trial and make your wedding website today. And don’t forget to nab your custom URL when you sign up for a yearly account. APW readers get 10% off your first Squarespace purchase when you use the code APW17 at checkout.


The Info:

Wedding Websites Images: “Rebekah and Javin” by Lauren Cowart Photo | “Our Story” by Meredith Bacon | “He Said Yes” by Yuliya Skya for Cosmopolitan Photo & Films | “Going Down for Real” by Lauren Cowart Photo | “Rebekah and Javin” by Lauren Cowart Photo | Featured Image: CreateHer Stock

Maddie Eisenhart

Maddie is APW’s Chief Revenue Officer. She’s been writing stories about boys, crushes, and relationships since she was old enough to form shapes into words, but received her formal training (and a BS) from NYU in Entertainment and Mass Media in 2008. She now spends a significant amount of time thinking about trends on the internet and whether flower crowns will be out next year. A Maine native, Maddie currently lives on a pony farm in the Bay Area with her husband, Michael and their mastiff puppy. Current hair color: Purple(ish).

[Read comment policy before commenting]

  • PeaceIsTheWay

    +100 for making no mention of gifts, if you don’t want any. Even a small registry is not at all required, especially if you’re only making one because you feel obligated to.

    • Not Sarah

      We didn’t super want a registry, but then we discovered there were a variety of things we were procrastinating buying because weddings are $$$. Our compromise was to try to make a registry and if we came up with some number of things, to post it and otherwise not. In the end, our gifts were half cash and half things off the registry and we are really delighted to have incredible steak knives for the first time in our lives.

      • PeaceIsTheWay

        I enjoyed making a registry for our baby shower, but just had no interest for our wedding. My husband and I already lived together, so there wasn’t this shared excitement of designing a household. There were so many other time consuming wedding prep activities that we actually cared about- invitations and playlists and seating arrangements- that we just skipped a registry entirely!

  • YummieYummie

    I love the idea of an “experiences” registry over a conventional one (we already have two of everything), but how does that work? Do guests give us money for trips? Do they full-on plan a whole excursion, hand us the tickets, and we go? I’m overthinking this.

    • Jess

      I’ve seen things like the HoneyFund website in the past. Basically, you link to experiences you want to do on a honeymoon (like… hang-gliding or scuba diving or a guided tour or I think you can even do like a fancy dinner), and then guests select something they want to buy you.

      I believe it works kind of like Zola and other non-store based registries where you technically just get the money but put it towards the intended items through the site.

      ETA: We did not do this, and I’m not plugging a specific site, just mentioning one I’ve seen a friend use so you can do more research! :)

    • I’m with Jess – co opt a honeyfund type website for a set of excursions. You can be really specific (£20 for a steak at McFancies) or vague (£20 towards a fancy dinner together), and have stuff that people can contribute to (£20 towards a dinner at McFancies, with a target of £200) and stuff that people can buy multiple times (£2 tea break together!). We’re using Buy our honeymoon for our honeymoon registry, but it’s super customisable, including the URL, so you could repurpose it fairly easily (also, if you google, there are discounts on the set up fees available).

  • Pingback: 5 Copy and Paste Wedding Website Wording Examples | Wedding Warriors TC | Wedding Planner | Kennewick, Richland, Pasco()

  • lurpy

    Real talk, those bowls are sweet as hell.

    • Sarah E

      I mean, I’m not mad at them at all. And they’re oven-safe! So practical.

    • GotMarried!

      I want the oyster one.

    • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

      I grew up near the ocean. It would make me super happy to have one of those mussel bowls to remind me of home.

    • NolaJael

      They are weirdly sincere for an object. Like they are trying so hard, yet still kinda awkward – a teenager in ceramic form.

  • Pingback: 5 Copy and Paste Wedding Website Wording Examples | Wedding Adviser()

  • B

    This isn’t great info. My fiancé and I are obsessed with our squarespace wedding website—they have the best templates.

    What about if you don’t care at all what your guests wear? Is it helpful to provide some information (“the event will be semiformal/informal”) or just say nothing and assume that people will wear what they want? Is a little bit of guidance more helpful than none at all, or am I verging on bossy/overthinking?

    Additionally, my fiancé and I (both vegan) are having a vegetarian wedding. The caterer we picked is making a ton of delicious cookout food: sliders and sides that happen to be veg. Should I mention on the wedding website that our wedding won’t have meat? This seems like a ridiculous question, but we are Midwesterners who come from families where omitting meat from a party is basically a crime. Will a head’s up on the wedding website be helpful for those who might want to prepare by eating a burger before/after (close family who know about the veg menu have already told us they plan to do this) or would it just call attention to a potentially unpopular detail?

    • Amy March

      If there isn’t a specific reason to have a dress code, don’t! Say nothing, people will dress themselves.

      The vegetarian thing is a tough call, and depends on your people. Personally, I’d skip it and let them just eat what they are served, but also make sure to be serving them a really delicious meal that doesn’t rely on fake meat- like I just wouldn’t serve veggie burgers for example because I think they scream sub-par substitute.

      See also https://apracticalwedding.com/host-vegan-wedding/

      • NolaJael

        I have to disagree with not having a dress code. Unless you are having a very homogeneous locals-only affair, what is “wedding appropriate” varies wildly by socioeconomic status and region. And the people who are likely to get tripped up are the outsiders (new boyfriends, plus ones, etc.) who aren’t familiar with family and regional norms. I’d throw them the smallest of bones and at least use the basic casual / business casual / cocktail or semi-formal / formal language somewhere.

        • Amy March

          None of those words have any meaning though. Especially if you’re talking about different groups of people! I have no clue what business casual means in this context. Is there a difference between formal semi formal and cocktail? Who knows. They aren’t directions, they’re just another code. If someone asks, sure tell them! But I think there is a reason the only time you put a dress code on an invite is if it’s black tie.

          • Katharine Parker

            I was invited to a “business casual” rehearsal dinner a while ago, and it was completely confusing. That isn’t a dress code that makes sense outside of an office to me.

          • Business casual is my personal nightmare, because I assume you mean I should wear khakis and a polo shirt.

          • Like, you might as well write, “Dress like Jake from State Farm.”

          • Katharine Parker

            Like, it’s a verizon store themed party!

          • Katharine Parker

            Two of the worst articles of clothing, and the scourge of some of my worst job experiences.

      • Zoya

        See, for me, “no dress code, say nothing” translates to “guests bugging the wedding couple for ages about what they should wear.” In my experience, people don’t take “I don’t care, really, I don’t care” at face value. If you don’t want to be fielding those questions for months, have at least some token language about it.

    • I wouldn’t flag up the meat thing – it’s not like you’re just serving sides (as I’m sure you’ve been served at carnivorous weddings!) but whole meals. If people want to ruin their appetite beforehand, more fool them – if they ask, be truthful, and if they’re on the ball they’ll realise you won’t be serving meat anyway, but I think you’ll create more anxiety than you’ll solve if you draw attention to it.

      The dress code is kinda the opposite – people will feel anxious if they don’t know whether or not they’ll fit in. If you’re happy with people in jeans and t-shirts, tell them that. Just bear in mind that you do need to be specific and clear in yourself what you’re expecting; semi-formal and informal aren’t the same and a mixed message will confuse people further. If Uncle Matt is wearing suit trousers, shiny black shoes and a crisp shirt while Auntie Bee wears ripped skinny jeans and a crop top, someone is going to feel uncomfortable.

      • penguin

        Absolutely yes on the dress code – even just general guidelines are better than nothing. Even with suggestions on our website, a ton of guests asked me what to wear/to look at their outfits ahead of time. It was weird.

        • Zoya

          Yup. People were asking me *the night before the wedding* what they should wear. I just cheerfully referred them to the website.

    • dress code info

      I think on apparel, you can mostly rely on people to take their cues from the time of day and location If those things will be unusual (whether obviously or not), I’d give guidance specific to the scenario–let folks know there will be a lot of walking on grass, that the cemetery at midnight is chilly and dark colors will help the neighbors not notice what’s going on, but afterwards there will be a pretty average dinner/dancing reception, etc. If you’re doing black- or white-tie (or optional), I also think you should spell that out, though I think the convention around that is to put it on the invite.

      • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

        …I want to go to that wedding.

    • PeaceIsTheWay

      I have little sympathy for people who don’t consider food to be a meal unless it includes meat. I wouldn’t mention it’s all vegetarian, personally.

    • Not Sarah

      I would absolutely tell people about the food being all vegetarian. I personally hate going to any event without knowing what type of food will be there and what time the food will come out, but that’s just me.

      If you invited someone over to your house for dinner, would they know or assume what you would serve them for dinner or would you tell them specifically in advance? I think that’s a guiding question here.

      • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

        If you *do* include a heads-up about it being veggie, try to frame it in a positive way. “We found a great caterer who makes absolutely delicious vegetarian food! We’re really excited for everyone to try them.” Or something like that. Focus on what’s happening, as opposed to what isn’t.

        • Jess

          “Focus on what’s happening, as opposed to what isn’t.”

          I feel like I’ve said this before w/ respect to wedding planning, but this is basically the greatest life advice.

          • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

            Right? Widely applicable, never expires.

      • Amy March

        I would never expect to see what time dinner is served or what exactly it is! That’s strange and not a requirement at all. I wouldn’t ever even offer that info up for a dinner party – why? I’m not operating a restaurant, pls tell me your dietary restrictions but beyond that I’m serving what I want.

        • CMT

          Right, I think knowing that you will be served a meal is good enough.

        • sofar

          Twinsie response!!!

        • Not Sarah

          It sounds like we have different crowds then as most of my crowd plans dinner parties in advance and gives a vague description of the menu and dinner time. So me stating those restrictions doesn’t really limit my dinner party attendance.

          • Amy March

            Huh. Yeah def not. I’d invite you at 7, and anticipate serving dinner sometime around 8ish? And I might say “hey come over I bought a whole duck” but more often than not, I’m deciding what I’m making that day or a day or two in advance. Do you usually see what the menu is for a wedding? Occasionally I’ll see “choose chicken or fish” but usually I have no idea beyond assuming if the wedding is at night there will be dinner, and if the wedding is at 5 dinner could be served anywhere from 7-9.

          • Not Sarah

            Someone might send out an email saying “Come over for board games at 2 pm and we’ll start the barbecue for dinner at 6:30 pm. BYOB. Bring your own food if you don’t eat hamburgers. There will be pie for dessert; please RSVP so we can buy the right amount.” That is a pretty typical invitation.

            No, I don’t usually see what the menu is for a wedding, unless they ask you for your entree preference. In those cases, I always take a couple bars in my purse just in case and end up stopping somewhere after the wedding if I didn’t eat enough of the food. I’m an adult though and it’s my prerogative, not yours, but it is helpful to know what you’re serving, especially if there is nowhere nearby to get food after.

            For our wedding, we did put the entire menu on the website because we knew we had people with a variety of dietary restrictions, so that they could tell us which foods they had problems with rather than us trying to guess for 100 people. We were able to accommodate all of them with a different cake, soup, salad, and varied entree changes.

      • sofar

        See, I host lots of dinner parties and hosted a wedding. I said nothing about food for the wedding and say nothing about food for my dinner parties except to ask people, “Hey do you have any dietary restrictions?”

        I think, when you’re being hosted, you kind of just have to trust that you won’t have the ultimate control (like you would if you’re going to a restaurant).

    • sofar

      I’m from the midwest, and I know that, if I’d *Announced* a vegan menu months in advance, I’d be opening myself up for months of kvetching.

      And, for the record, my cousin managed to serve a 100% vegan meal to my meat-eating, vegetarian-mocking family without them even noticing. She served an Italian feast. They all had seconds and raved about the food. You are serving a full meal, so you’re good.

      The ONLY time I think a heads-up on food is required is if you’re having a meal-time wedding with nothing but appetizers.

    • Zoya

      I didn’t care at all about what the guests wore, but I knew that our particular crowd would want some guidance. (People started asking me “what should I wear??” MONTHS in advance.) Here’s the wording we put on our wedding website:

      “This is a relaxed daytime wedding. While you’re welcome to wear a suit or a cocktail dress, it’s by no means required. Sundresses and slacks are great, and we’ll never say no to an awesome hat. There will be dancing, so bring comfortable shoes!”

      People had a lot of fun with the “dress code!” We had everything from three-piece suits to seersucker to jeans and button-downs.

    • For the dress code, it depends on how much you care about fielding questions. Guidance is just another way of avoiding having to answer questions personally. So even if you don’t care what your guests wear, it’s nice to do what Zoya suggests below. (Especially for out of towners who might not be familiar with the weather or the terrain. I, for example, grew up in humidity. So I wasn’t expecting my first California summer when I learned the hard way that it can be 60 degrees at night after a 100 degree day.)

      As for your menu, I feel like a vegetarian menu is not something you need to share with your guests ahead of time. People hear “vegetarian” and think “not food” until you point out that, for example, pasta is vegetarian. Anyway, if your close family already know, then world will get around a bit too. But I don’t see any reason to let people know in advance unless you’re worried it’s SO far out there that people just won’t eat it.

    • Kate

      Please please please put a dress code on your website. Everyone likes to crap on vague, confusing dress codes. But no dress code is even worse. Especially if, as a guest, I don’t know the crowd or the locale.

    • Eenie

      We included what we were wearing – specifically the man if there is one in the couple: “Husband is sporting a suit with no tie and sneakers. The venue is air conditioned. Please dress comfortably, and sparkles are encouraged!”

  • penguin

    This will really vary based on your crowd. We thought our people were physical-gifts-or-bust people, so we put a lot of time into making 3 registries at different stores. Almost no one got us a physical gift and we ended up with mostly cash or checks. Which is great! But not what we expected. Also almost nobody looked at our wedding website, even if I pointed them in that direction for information – even our friends who I KNOW are online all the time. It was frustrating to say the least. I like the wording suggested in this article though.

    • Sarah E

      Yeah, we made a Squarespace site and I think no more than maybe 5 people looked at it, even though our invitation was a bit unconventional (no RSVP card, just our contact info and website).

      • YummieYummie

        One thing I’ve been thinking about doing is putting QR codes on our Save the Dates that link directly to the site. That way, the STDs just have super basic info (date, place, etc.) and people can just scan it with their phone to get everything else on the site.

        • Amy March

          Does anyone know how to do this? I’d have no idea what to do with a QR code and I’m betting a big portion of your guests won’t either. If you just think it’s cool go for it though!

          • penguin

            Yeah I don’t think a QR code would be any faster/used any more than just having a URL. No harm in it if you just think it’s cool though.

          • YummieYummie

            Me, fiance, and all our friends are in super technical fields, so maybe it makes more sense to us. I know that the iphone’s native camera app can read them and you just hover your phone over it for a moment (it works the same as the Snapchat feature to add friends irl). Not sure about android, though.

            It looks cool and futuristic, so it would go with our unofficial theme for the wedding (we’re working on booking the Space and Rocket Center). If only us young’uns can figure it out, its just the STDs, so no big deal.

          • Eenie

            Only do this if you also put the URL on the STD please! I am very technically savvy but would hate having to download a QR reader on my phone just so I can get to your website. I also take photos of the STDs and would want to have the website in the photo. Can you click through a QR code that’s on a picture on your phone already?

          • YummieYummie

            Of course! Unfortunately, you can’t click through an image since it’s a different data type (but you can always scan the image with your camera, lol!). But now based on the reactions to my idea, I’m wondering if I don’t quite understand the point of a STD. Judging from STDs I’ve received, I thought that they’re supposed to be fairly succinct with just a date, place, and website. The benefit of the QR code is that instead of having to type out the whole URL or search by names/wedding hashtags, you look at the image with your phone’s camera and it takes you directly to the page. It seems like that would add to the succinct-ness, but I didn’t realize how many people didn’t know what they were/ how to use them.

      • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

        Did people still e-RSVP, or did you have to hunt everyone down?

        • Sarah E

          We got emails from most people, and took a lot of informal info from in-laws. My in-laws family grapevine is pretty strong. They have a huge family, but the aunts/uncles generation stays well-connected, so we didn’t have to hunt too hard for anyone we hadn’t heard from directly. I think I had to reach out to one or two cousins at most on my side. We also didn’t serve dinner, so hard numbers weren’t as important.

          I think what helped was that we had phone number and email listed for both my husband and myself. I don’t think anyone called, everyone emailed, and they could choose one or both of us to write to. Maybe a handful or fewer people used the form RSVP on the website, which I only included as a back-up avenue to collect responses.

          • PAJane aka Awesome Tits

            Useful info! I’d like to go the paper invite/digital RSVP route. We set up a wedding-specific email for planning purposes, so I’ll just make sure to include that for people who would prefer to email.

    • NolaJael

      I think that the likelihood of people looking at the wedding website are based on two things: 1) not being familiar with the area (lots of out-of-town guests) and 2) forcing them to use it because you don’t provide the info elsewhere (inserts, by phone, etc.). If you have all locals they’ll be familiar with the spaces and attendant weather / dress code norms. Or if your mother likes to play the role of cruise director then everyone will be predisposed to ask her for ideas, directions, attire recommendations, etc.

      • penguin

        That was the weird thing – we had almost entirely out of town guests, and still pretty much nobody looked at it. I think it’ll just vary based on your people. We provided the basic info on the invite (time, name of the inn, date) but put everything else (like addresses) on the website.

  • Anne

    A couple things from our experience:

    1) We noticed that out-of-town guests were more likely to look at the website, because they will need more info on accommodations, directions, etc. If you have mostly local guests the whole thing might be less worthwhile.

    2) +100 for just doing a small registry if you don’t want many gifts. We had a note something like the one above, but we also just had a small registry with a mix of traditional & non-traditional gifts, and it worked almost perfectly. People who were dead set on getting us a kitchen item could get us a kitchen item if they were on top of things, we received nearly everything we actually wanted, and on top of that we received a number of very kind cash gifts and charitable donations from late gift-givers.
    Also, if you don’t want to receive physical gifts at the wedding (i.e. because it’s far away from your residence), mention that on the website as well if your registry doesn’t have an option to require it. You would think this would be obvious if people know where you live, but you never know.

    • penguin

      We were surprised at how many people brought physical gifts to the wedding. One of my aunts actually went out of the way to have the stuff shipped to her house (instead of our address which was on the registry), wrapped it, then drove it across multiple states to bring it. It was very weird. Thankfully we had people on hand to drop stuff off at our place since we left directly for the honeymoon.

      • Amy March

        Ugh people. Never* bring a boxed gift to a wedding! You’re just making work!

        * yeah sure whatever I’m sure there is some circumstance that makes it ok

        • suchbrightlights

          I think the only circumstance that makes it anything other than an inconvenience is if you have already agreed to transport your gift, other gifts, and other items back to the couple’s place of residence.

          Signed,
          Friend with a hatchback, designated end-of-party schlepper for hire

          • Not Sarah

            Ugh I was really surprised at how many people brought gifts to the venue!!! One person messaged to ask if there was a place to leave gifts at the venue and I was like probably but then we have to transport them home and we aren’t driving that night. They responded with “Oh.” and shipped it to our house.

  • anon for this

    Kind of awkward, but what about website language for when… you DO want gifts? Most wording for including a registry is “we don’t want any presents but your presence!” etc. Which seems a bit misleading if we really are hoping to build up our nice dishes and cookware collection for the house we just bought. Or is it just the polite thing to do? Any thoughts?

    • Amy March

      Do you need wording? I usually just see a tab labeled “registry” and then “Jill and Tony are registered at BB&B and Bloomingdales”, often with a link. No need for any explanation! And certainly don’t say you don’t want gifts.

    • penguin

      We just had a page labeled Registry, which had links to our registries at 3 different places. No other text at all – people know what a registry is.

    • Eenie

      Agree with @disqus_S6iEtjGKhk:disqus below. Some let you mark “high priority items” – so mark the dishes and cookware as high priority if they aren’t the only things on there.

  • Brigid

    Nota bene! Don’t copy and paste the childcare one, because “Don’t hesitate to let us know how we further help!” is missing a word.

  • Pingback: Steal These: Wedding Website Wording Examples | Wedding Adviser()